It seemed like everybody who was anybody outrageously hot stopped by the In-Style Golden Globes After-Party last night. It’s certainly the biggest of the bunch and most of the self-congratulating thespianic crowd plus a whole bunch of models and divas make their way to the party after the four hour ‘ain’t we awesome, peace out’ ceremony is over.
I’m talking Taylor Swift with her arm draped around Lorde like she was her date, Selena Gomez righteously hot, Alessandra Ambrosio, Sarah Hyland, Cara Delevingne, Hilary Duff, and a ton others looking all sparkly and shiny and cleavetastic. It’s eerily reminiscent of the parties I used to throw in high school, only with the addition of tons of ridiculously hot women. Okay, well, any women. Still, I had the best mixed tapes. I bet Lorde would’ve loved them. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Getty
Taylor Swift braved the cold in New York’s Time Square to provide a strutting performance for revelers who would delight in a mini-Taylor Swift concert on New Year’s Eve. She really did have quite a spectacular past year, both professionally, and personally, as we watched her legs on nearly permanent display through all foru seasons.
Taylor doesn’t quite reach the exhibitionist threshold of her fellow pop stars when it comes to concert wardrobes, she’s a bit more reserved, which could be considered higher maintenance, but I just think about it as a greater challenge. Not that I would put myself through being her boyfriend, too many rungs on that ladder, but for a post-show NYE round of meaningless but memorable making of the sexy to show her exes she’s not as boring as they all say, I’d allow myself to be used in that manner. I am giving. Taylor Swift is receiving. We’re already a match. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Splash
Taylor Swift really is getting better looking. Not that my belusted, albeit perhaps difficult girlfriend not girlfriend was ever not pretty, but something is coming with maturity and work outs and just wanting to show off more that is causing the tall Taylor to reach new heights on my tingle meter. Yes, I have a tingle meter. I got it for Christmas 2011. Still works great though killer on the batteries.
Taylor showed off on the red carpet of the Z100 Radio Jingle Ball turn over the weekend. She performed later on and I’m sure her music was sufficiently moving, but it was her cut-out dress on the carpet that caused me to start foaming slightly, but noticeably, at the mouth. She is a looker. I’m aware of her reputation for writing not so complimentary songs about her exes, but I could easily live with ‘He boinked me 100 times then ditched me because he couldn’t handle the real me’ as the veiled line casting shade on me. Sacrifices must be made. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: FameFlyNet / INFphoto.com
Tis the season to be jolly and ogling aplenty, including the morass, array, and otherwise abundance of Jingle Balls that occur for radio station sponsored events around the country’s major metro areas the first couple weeks of December. I’m not sure the musical amalgamation will go down in history as one of the more monumental events in the audible sounds category, but you can rest assured the pop diva hotties will be on the red carpet and competing for top sextastic dog credentials.
The L.A. event sponsored by KIIS FM brought out the likes of Taylor Swift, Rita Ora, Charli XCX, Iggy Azalea, and teen Latina sensation Becky G in her school girl outfit pretending this was innocuous. All the ladies looked smoking hot and had they proceeded into some kind of burlesque bit rather than auto-tuned pop songs, the night may have been perfect, or at least closer to my dreams of a hot tub in the green room where the girls let me loofah them in between acts. You can’t lip-synch if your lips aren’t rehearsed. I have precisely the right exercises for that. Oh, Taylor, Iggy, Charli and no comment on Becky for a few more months. You made my evening. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: FameFlyNet
Fresh off of an appearance at the U.S. Victoria’s Secret Fashion show a year earlier where some of the cattier models said Taylor Swift just couldn’t cut it as a lingerie model, Taylor came back twice as strong showing off in some medium level revealing lingerie items on the runway and performing on stage in London along with mega minxy hottie Ariana Grande in her traditionally tiny little tight two piece performance ensemble. Yes, I used the word ensemble. No, I don’t suddenly have an interest in belts and accessories.
Taylor Swift really did steal the show, coming out onstage with her slender girl buddy Karlie Kloss, the two of whom I imagine deeply entwined in Sapphic lust each evening in Taylor’s $20 million New York condo of quiet climaxes. I’m probably wrong, but I’d prefer to believe I’m right. In either case, these two daily workout partners strutted their hot legs and slender forms down the runway, before Taylor broke into song then later Ariana for a show that was entirely visually pleasing. And that was even before the Angels came out in bras and panties. Quite an evening. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Getty Images / Splash News / GSI / INFphoto.com
In the annals of hot babedom there has rarely been a specimen as sexy as Taylor Swift. This is particularly true with regard to her legs. She was showing them off in a short skirt while traipsing around Hollywood over the weekend. I’ve said it before, and I will undoubtedly say it again, Taylor Swift has the best legs on the planet. Some people may disagree with me and say that I’m a fool. These people are entitled to their wrong opinion. We live in America where everyone is free to choose which pop princess they find the most fappable. But I believe that one day history will be on my side and will pronounce once and for all that Taylor Swift’s stems are superior to all others. I mean, just look at them! They are long and lean and utterly flawless.
The best thing about Taylor is that she knows and appreciates the fact that all of us like to look at her legs and so she is always wearing short skirts. Even now when it is kinda cold. Thank you, Taylor. Thank you for being uncomfortable so that we can ogle your legs.
Okay, Taylor Swift may not be the ideal girlfriend, the label hella high maintenance being tossed around. And you may not dig her music so much, the country pop or the new bubble gum over-produced pop. But you’ve got to give it up for her looks of late. Confident, worked out body, tight dresses, often very show skirts, and that coquettish smile that actually might be real coquette. Okay, you can choose not to give it up, I’m not even sure what that means, but I’m golf clapping and dreaming of Taylor running to me when rebounding hard from a disastrous celebrity boyfriend relationship and demanding I do all sorts of things to her that the Bible clearly prohibits. It could happen.
Taylor Swift didn’t just become a superstar by chance. There are plenty of cute girls from the country music parts of this nation who play guitar and look good in sundresses. She’s got that special bit of talent mixed with that special bit of ‘it’ quality now mixed with a skin tight wardrobe that is kind of driving me crazy. Taylor, I stand firmly behind you. That is both literal and figurative. You may now hide the children. Enjoy.