The stretch pants as pants phenomenon righteously claims yet another victory for the gentleman ogler with some snappy ship o’ the desert type cleft reveals from our be-lusted little Reese Witherspoon, a petite bit of blonde mama hotness who routinely leaves the house with spandex as her primary form of clothing. A solid fashion choice in every sense of the word.
Now if we could only advance our legislation passed regarding maximum bodily capacity allowed to don the stretch pants, we could bring a complete harmony to the universe. Enjoy.
According to my singles dating profile (you know, still up there even though there’s a girlfriend because a good fisherman always keeps a freshly baited line in the water) I love museums and hiking. The first makes me sound culturally relevant, the second makes me sound outdoorsy. But I don’t go to the museums, because I like my entertainment to speak back to me in surround sound volumes, and hiking is an an endeavor that became outmoded with the invention of the motorcar, now, it’s purely for urban hipsters and serial killers. Though I do wish I had hiked my sorry ass over to the Los Angeles County Museum of Art (the dating profile must call it LACMA, like you go there often) over the weekend to the Art + Film gala which brought out an intense bevy of Hollywood beauties in support of what I’m sure was a fantastic cause.
Kate Beckinsale any time, any where, but looking especially hot all red carpeted out in her finest, along with underrated dark beauty, Camilla Belle, Amy Adams who never fails to look like a girl you desperately wish you could hook up with as your summer girlfriend, Kate Hudson fully back from rock star baby making Part 2, Olivia Wilde, cankly but super hot, Reese Witherspoon out of her jogging suit and into a little black dress, and Zoe Saldana, another underrated sexy bomb looking all kinds of hot. Yep, the museum is the place to be, the museum is the place for me. Enjoy.
Jennifer Lopez is back to fighting shape. (TMZ)
Celebrating this week’s birthday girl, Kendall Jenner. (HuffPo)
The model who was banging the son of Moammar Qaddafi.(FoxNews)
Jennifer Aniston and Malin Akerman new movie. (GossipCenter)
Reese Witherspoon and Cameron Diaz bond over being rich, blonde and hot. (LaineyGossip)
Jennifer Love Hewitt keeps the cleavage train rolling. (Popoholic)
Lea Michele braless cleavage. (Popoholic)
Keira Knightley talks getting spanked. (HuffPo)
Reese Witherspoon gets banged up. (TMZ)
The greatest sex scandals in history. (CollegeHumor)
Digging Taylor Swift new look? (SocialiteLife)
Hotties can run but they can’t hide. (TheChive)
Ashley Greene wants some more. (GossipCop)
Julianne Hough looking particularly cleavy. (Popoholic)
Julianne Moore fulfills our hot teacher fantasies. (HuffPo)
Bikini Battle: Audrina Patridge vs. Whitney Port. (FoxNews)
Reese Witherspoon gets hit by a car. (TMZ)
Damn you, auto-correct! (CollegeHumor)
Ali Lohan isn’t fooling anybody. (theFABlife)
Hottest ginger celebrities. (Ranker)
(First and foremost: Reese, we hope you’re on the mend after a jogging run-in with an old lady and her big Buick. Somebody needs to pry the wheels of these large steel beasts out of these seniors’ hands at some age, just know that it won’t be me. Way too scared. Oh, also, hypocritical note to my future offspring: you’ll have to pry the keys to my sweet-ass Corolla out of my cold dead hands. I ain’t ever giving them up.)
Reese Witherspoon might as well shout out to the heavens, I’m here, I’m back, I’m hot again, after the petite blonde took some time off from hottie life to find herself after divorce and whatnot, ease up on the everyday anger jogging (which almost got her killed yesterday), founds herself a new man (okay, well, her agent, but he’s a dude), threw on some little bits of clothing, and posed all hot and sexy for the October edition of Marie Claire magazine, which I just gave a beatdown to my delinquent neighbor Pammy for trying to ‘borrow without permission’ from my mailbox. Look, Pammy, you’re in fifth grade now, and I will hold your ass accountable for your actions. But I digress. Reese looks downright upright inducing in this little black and white pictorial, that is now subtly hanging from the wall of my guest bathroom.
Oh, Reese, get better soon, take off more clothes, take more pictures. We’ll all be blessed. Enjoy.
Beyonce bikini pictures prove she’s knocked up. (TMZ)
Reese Witherspoon leggy new magazine spread. (HuffPo)
Irina Shayk dons some hot lingerie. (FoxNews)
Michael Bay has a hot new model girlfriend. (COED)
Kelly Brook and Emma Watson class it up. (DrunkenStepfather)
How to make bowling fun. (CollegeHumor)
Is Gwyneth Paltrow sleeping around? (TheSuperficial)