Oh, Maria Menounos bikini pictures are blessedly back, as the Extra TV hostess and holder of so many of our faptastic dreams made her way back to the motherland, Greece, to show the goddesses on Mt. Olympus just how it’s done.
Nobody quite seems to delight in beach time play time as much as Maria Menounos. Not only does she fit her bikinis perfectly, her exuberant play almost always causes her body to slip or peek out of her two pieces at some juncture. This closely parallels the feeling we get when we see Maria in a skimpy bikini. Exuberant and slipping accidentally out of our bottoms. Maria knows how to press the ‘Imagine Now’ button on the gentleman ogler. And she presses it with authority. Enjoy.
Check Out the Maria Bikini Fun Time Video »
Our belusted Grecian goddess turned 35 over this past weekend, and while we are still awaiting word what Maria Menounos thought of the birthday present we sent over (hopefully, all the blood had dried by time of delivery), the sextastic TV hostess seemed to be having one fine time at her tequila themed party where she flaunted her tube tops in a bikini top that made us pray for a birthday malfunction.
While the evening was almost ruined by the Kardashian family invites, nothing could spoil a night of booze and boobtastic courtesy of a woman we’d like to circumnavigate the globe with in a tiny dinghy, with nothing to slake our thirst save for each other’s sacred bodily fluids. Call me, Maria, I’m down at the docks awaiting your arrival. Enjoy.
I’m not exactly sure what the Critics’ Choice Awards are, but I can tell you they chose wisely. I say that by default as Maria Menounous, Kaley Cuoco, and Emmy Awesome all made their way elegantly and quite sextastically down the red carpet of the TV awards show.
Maybe the awards celebrate TV stars we’d most like to see strip out of their clothing, at least, if I’m guessing the award based on the entrants, that’s what I surmise. Though I’m not a critic, just a lover. I leave the criticisms and regrets to my girlfriends. Enjoy.
All kidding aside, Kim Kardashian is about to have her first unwed baby, a major point of pride in the Kardashian household. And time to celebrate. So the sisters three and their puppet master mother got together and threw the biggest, brashest, most expensive baby shower ever. And maybe somebody sort of kind of filmed it all for television to pay for it and then some. Still, ever so magical, including the stunning announcement that the baby is a girl. Not so stunning really since there’s a 50-percent chance it’s a girl, and that’s even before the maniacal K’s spun that sperm into a high chance of female offspring.
Still, baby showers mean girls in pretty dresses, and while Kim wanted to be the swollen belle of her own ball, a couple hotties did make their way into the party. Most notably, Grecian goddess Maria Menounos showing off just a nice hint of cleavage, and a shoutout to veteran Pussycat Doll founder and dancer, Robin Antin, who nearly 20-years later is still looking mighty well-shaped. I bet the party itself was amazing. Sadly, no boys were allowed so I did not receive my music box invitation. Enjoy.
There’s no denying I’m super geeked to see Star Trek Into Darkness this Friday.
The only way to elevate that geeked-ness to levels beyond quantitative science would be to escort Maria Menounos and her just chillingly amazing booty to the movies. The derriere of the Greek goddess was on display last night at the Hollywood premiere of STID (not to be confused with the STDs Maria and I would passionately exchange later on in the evening). What a bottom this sextastic woman has.
It’s always been there, it’s always been great, but, of late, it’s just churning out heat like a badonkadonk supernova. I want it. And I want to take it to the movies. I wonder if Maria would find it rude if I asked her to watch Star Trek next to me while sitting with her knees on the chair and facing backwards to the screen. You can’t know for sure until you ask I guess. Enjoy.
Wow, well, hello backside of our Grecian princess, Maria Menounos. Somebody’s got a badonkadonk to remember. Not that we’d ever forget Maria, we can’t not think about her for more than about ten seconds. But with this bodacious buttside staring us in the face, wow, once again.
Just when you think you can’t lust for Maria Menounos any harder, she goes and shows off a hot dumper that if you’re not thinking about squeezing with both hands, both feet, and any other working appendage, you’re simply not even trying. Enjoy.
And that includes walking a pony. I’ve said it really doesn’t matter what Grecian princess Maria Menounos does, I’m onboard and ogling hard.
So I’m hardly backing down from my blanket statement as she parades a pony around The Grove for some purpose not quite as exciting as the last time I saw a woman with a pony when I was in Tijuana. True story. I wouldn’t see that show again. But I will continue to leer at Maria doing anything from scrubbing her toilets to undressing in her dressing room mirror from a perch on the oak tree outside her window (not that I’ve been scouting). Enjoy.