Maria Menounos

Happy Birthday, Maria Menounous, 34 Years of Greek Goddess Bikini Hotness

By Bill Swift | June 11, 2012 @ 1:15 am

Menounos Peek-a-Boob

A beautiful glimpse down a wondrous rabbit hole 4 Photos »

Maria's Infamous Lipslip

It was a New Year's Day miracle come true when we saw the nest 9 Photos »

Maria Menounos Curves

Maria Menounos in a Tight, Gray Dress on the Set of Extra

Definite Top 5 best body in a super tight dress in Tinsel Town 8 Photos »

Glad she got our cake. And more glad Maria Menounos decided to celebrate her birthday over the weekend by putting on a bikini and sharing a photo of herself with the drooling male public.

At 34, Maria shows zero signs of slowing down; if anything, her hotness bulb is burning brighter than ever,maybe it's the dancing or the Pilates, or just the knowledge that a million men are fapping to her at any given moment on this spinning globe, but this sextastic celebrity is absolutely glowing.

χρόνια πολλά, Maria!

Maria Menounos Indy 500 Hotness Started My Engine And It Still Hasn’t Stopped

By Bill Swift | May 29, 2012 @ 9:29 am

Maria Menounos Steps Out in a Mini Dress at the Indy 500

View the Gallery / 9 Photos »

You know the old Egotastic! test for hotness -- if you can't stop checking her out and she's fully dressed -- you probably won't even survive the undressing.

Maria Menounos lives on that plane of hotness. And it was on full display over the Memorial Day Weekend as Maria flashed her sextastic at the Indy 500 where that loud engine whirring sound was actually 100,000 male spectators shuffling uncomfortably in their seats upon spotting the Mt. Olympian goddess and collectively feeling the urge to cover her in a bath of Greek yogurt (that last part may have just been me). Enjoy.

Maria Menounos Still Flashing Her Hiney for Dancing With the Stars Rehearsals

By Bill Swift | May 14, 2012 @ 11:55 am

Maria Menounos Leaves the Dance Studios Barefoot

View the Gallery / 11 Photos »

Sadly, I must admit to not spending much time following the current season of Dancing With the Stars, but I had even more fun things to do with my time like gouging out my eye with a hot fireplace poker and contracting rabies from squirrel through a nasty bite to my taint. I just can't bring myself to watch dudes in costumes dancing. I'm genetically programmed to feel violently diarrhetic when I come into visual contact with such sights, or, worse, people talking about how wonderful such sights are.

However, my blind rage is not so blinding that I can't give kudos to the show producers for keeping the epically sextastic Maria Menounos on the show week after week, meaning we get to see her practicing and warming up in skin tight dancer gear week to week, it's all making us quite weak in the knees. Just look at that arse. Avast! Enjoy.

AVE MARIA! JUST SUCH A DELICIOUS VISUAL TREAt WHEREVER AND WHENEVER

Maria Menounos Super Sexy in White Lacey Bikini

20 Photos »

Jessica Alba, Sara Jean Underwood, and Aubrey O’Day Among the Hotties Showing Off in This Week’s Sextastic Twitpic Roundup

By Bill Swift | May 10, 2012 @ 1:25 pm

Aubrey O'Day Showing Butt Crack While Trying on a Dress

Jessica Alba and Sofia Vergara Celebrating Cinco De Mayo

Jessica Alba before The Met Costume Gala

Elizabeth Gillies Busty in White Tank Top

Alexa Vega Trying on dress in Dressing Room

Amanda Holden Sideboob Shot Prepping for Britain's Got Talent TV Show

View the Gallery / 33 Photos »

It's something like a phenomenon, baby. These hot celebrities just can't stop celebrating their own hotness by way of Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, and other media where they get to control what goes out there of their own image. And, by control, I mean they simply can't get enough of showing themselves off to the general public. Without egos, there'd be no Egotastic!

This week's Sextastic Twitpic Roundup includes the precious delights of Jessica Alba and Sofia Vergara partying together on Cinco De Mayo, Sara Jean Underwood flashing her every ready cleavage, Adrianne Curry in some memorably revealing poses, Aubrey O'Day showing lots of nekkid butt, and so much more goodness, it must be seen to be be-lusted. Enjoy.

Okay, So Maybe The Dude Grinding Maria Menounos Is the World’s Luckiest Bastard

By Bill Swift | May 10, 2012 @ 8:29 am

The Forbidden Dance!

Maria Menounos and Derek Hough Dirty Dancing

View the Gallery / 10 Photos »

We're going to break a cardinal rule here on Egotastic!, a rule we loathe to break, but we really must this morning show you some 'dude' in order to explain how effin' luck this said dude is.

In the past couple of days we've been exploring the plummeting depths of our jealousy of those folks who get to be extremely close and naughtily intimate with some of our most sextastic celebrities. Well, now include this Derek Hough character who took to the cameras on Extra yesterday to rub it in the world's face just how he gets to rub his chub up against Maria Menounos these past few months and get paid for the privilege. Lucky bastard.

As you know, there is no reason for a straight man to ever dance other than a line of activities that directly leads to mating. This Derek dude has discovered a second reason and we're jealous. Enjoy.

Here's how we prefer to see our belusted Ave Maria, in a girl on girl sandwich with Nina Dobrev!

MMMM, NOW THAT'S A SEXTASTIC SANDWICH

Nina Dobrev Stops by on the Set of Extra with Maria Menounos

10 Photos »

Well Hello Sextastic Sandwich Fantasy! Christie Brinkley Visits Maria Menounos on the Set of Extra

By Bill Swift | May 8, 2012 @ 2:43 pm

Christie Brinkley Visits with Maria Menounos on Set of Extra

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I think everybody is well aware of just how ridiculously hot Christie Brinkley continues to shine in the sextastic sky even as she hits some unbelievable years of age. It's some kind of deal she made with the devil that involved having sex with Billy Joel and that bought her eternal youth or something like that. Not sure I'd make that deal myself, but Christie did, thank god, so we get to see her veteran hotness perched right astride Grecian princess Maria Menounos, the two girls giggling it up at The Grove on the set of Extra in an entirely innocent scene that somehow has me thinking nothing but X-rated thoughts (wait, does the use of foreign objects always now receive the triple X rating?).

The mere hint of the notion of the whisper of a thought of the trifecta of Christie Brinkley and Maria Menounos and myself at my Motel 6 hideaway with nothing but a Costco bulk sized bag of Circus Peanuts and a handwritten posted sign that forbids clothing for the weekend is more than enough to send me reaching for my calming tonics.

Oh, my. Two generations of super hotties. It does not get better than that. Enjoy.

IF CHRISTIE BRINKLEY HAS TO DRINK THE BLOOD OF BABIES TO LOOK LIKE THIS, SO BE IT

Christie Brinkley in a Red Dress at Good Morning America

16 Photos »

Maria Menounos Bikini Pictures For Your Lime Green Cinco De Hotness

By Bill Swift | May 7, 2012 @ 9:21 am

View the Gallery / 15 Photos »

And how did you celebrate your Cinco de Mayo?

Though not of Latin heritage, who am I not to go hog wild in celebration of anything to do with a victory over the French (aw, c'mon, France, we kid, you're a wonderful nation of hot women, but back in the day, you did rule parts of Mexico with an iron fist of brie), so, yeah, I had uno o dos too many cervezas and didn't wake up until the evening of Seis de Mayo. But I really wish I had been in Vegas at the Bud Light Party where ungodly hot Maria Menounos was getting her sextastic lime bikini on in a manner that can only be described as faptastic.

We did our best to cut out her silly male dancing partner from Dancing With the Stars, as best we could to present clean, uncut, unadulterated ridiculously hot Maria Menounos bikini pictures. Because that is the best kind of hangover helper. Enjoy.