It’s Battle of the Boobtastic time. That once a week epic moment when we provide the entire world the premiere roadmap for solving it’s conflicts with soft billowing boobs as opposed to all that other nonsense. This week’s BoB features the rock solid but beachy soft Lissy Cunningham and her light locks of uncovered goodness and veteran brawler Sam Cooke who can and will hold her own. As would you if those amazing yams were in your possession constantly.
But the hard choices come by way of your votes. Unlike Congressional elections, these votes really can and do count for something. Funbag supremacy for a week of cheers. Or, in the case of the loser, a week of tears. Now, you must decided between the winner and the not-winner. In your blessedly expert opinion, between these two gem stones, whose ta-ta’s reign supreme?
You really hate to see blonde on brunette chesty violence. And, by hate, I mean you want to buy front row seats and a bag of circus peanuts candy, which I’m pretty sure are a healthy source of protein. But darn if Lissy Cunningham and her blonde ambitions isn’t throwing down this week in the Battle of the Boobtastic against petite but busty brunette Cournie Quinlan to see who has the finer chest puppies in the final week of August.
Game on. I haven’t been able to make an important decision since I went with PB&J over cheese sandwich in first grade cafeteria. So, I turn to you, my faithful readers and office time wasters. In your vaunted, valued, and otherwise prurient opinion, whose ta-ta’s reign supreme?
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With so much upheaval in the world, I do hope people will once again look at my forward thinking plan to settle all future disputes by contest of hot girls with outrageously plump funbags. I know there’s some thrill in full scale bloodletting, but I really do believe sweater puppies properly unleashed can save this world of the need for such primitive forms of conflict resolution. Think of it as pacifism with a twist of crazy fine melons.
This week’s non-violent Battle of the Boobtastic pits blonde bodacious battler Lissy Cunningham against my ginger lovely Lucy Collett. I could never possibly play favorites among two girls to whom I’d give my entire world for just one appropriately placed kiss. However, you must play favorites. It’s your sacred duty. In your veteran ogling opinion, whose ta-ta’s reign supreme?
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I’m not sure she actually said that, but once we pit our two female warriors in the Thunderdome of the heavenly teats, you never know what kind of passions might ensure. The girls, my own, it can all get very emotionally and physically messy, if all goes well.
Once again we have two of the finest ladies on the planet baring their wares for a chance to be crowned winner of the Battle of the Boobtastic. Will it be Lissy Cunningham or Rhian Sugden in this ferocious hot battle of the even hotter blondes? Heck if I know. As always, you the time wasters at work and school must choose the fate of the ladies. Between these two heavenly female forms, whose ta-ta’s reign supreme?
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Who dares to bare their wares in challenge to the fine funbags of my red-headed beauty queen Lucy Collett. Okay, granted, Lucy may not be naturally ginger, but she is naturally endowed with some of the finest lady curves on this planet. Therefore, I do not envy the task of the albeit hot herself Lissy Cunningham as she places her sweet puppies front and center in a Battle of the Boobtastic with Lucy.
The prize goes to the bold among us. But today there can be only one prize awarded. The vaunted imaginary briefcase full of small denomination bills that goes to the more impressive of the udderly fine contestants in today’s battle. Now, it’s time for you to pick the winner. Between these two stout lasses, whose ta-ta’s reign supreme?
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Well, well, well, what do we have here? A new contender for the title of the hottest funbags on the planet of the week in the middle of the polar vortex? Indeed. Blonde hottie Lissy Cunningham has entered the Thunderdome of the ta-ta’s and lifted her shirt up against brunette veteran Courtnie Quinlan in the weekly Battle of the Boobtastic. Oh, man, this promises to be a revelation of a chest-down.
As always, one girl will go home with the virtual gold cup, while the other will run off in tears wondering why her cups came in second. This is the sad reality of competition. But not self-esteem ‘we’re all winners here’ in the cages of juggy battles. So, you must decide, in your experienced and wise opinion, whose ta-ta’s reign supreme?
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