Lily Aldridge certainly deserves a little more attention. I mean, any girl who can sell clothes by not really wearing any deserve a special type of salute. And while it would not be polite for a man to give that salute in public, take a look at Lily covering herself up barely for Victoria’s Secret and you’ll see what I’m saying.
I’m not exactly sure how the whole twisted body covered topless pose came into being, though I know I do love it. It’s not exactly as if women walk around with their bodies contorted and their forearms covering their chest puppies. Though what a fine world that would be. While not the inventor, Lily Aldridge is one of the perfecters, so, today, we salute her. Not together mind you, but, each of us, privately. Enjoy.
Look, you’ve got one week left of today to either get a little nookie or find yourself alone on the couch come Valentine’s Day, the single biggest trap day of the year for men, when the odds of success are stacked against you mightily.
As always, I will remind you that what women want from Valentine’s Day is a story to tell all their friends who are telling their stories, or better yet, to do some token gesture of romance in front of their friends or coworkers. Remember, women don’t care what they get, they just care that their girlfriends get to say, ‘Oh, you are so lucky!’ on the big V-Day. I don’t know, guys have The Super Bowl and all their weird traditions. Valentine’s Day is The Super Bowl for women. Just suck it up and play the game.
And as if you weren’t feeling pressure from all quarters, now consider the pressure in your drawers as you feast eyes upon Candice Swanepoel and Lily Aldridge, in store for Victoria’s Secret promoting their favorite Valentine’s Day gift packages. Obviously, Valentine’s Day is the monster sales holiday for the lingerie store, but, again, I caution you, purchasing lingerie for your girl raises the odds of failure on V-Day to the extreme. It’s the danger zone where so many a man has epically failed. Nobody fails with flowers and dinner, I’m just saying. Still, revel in the fantasy that Valentine’s Day has anything to do with men with a couple hot peeks at the hot peaks of Candice and Lily. Enjoy.
Our very favorite time of the week. Friday. And not just because we have personally interpreted company policy to understand that Friday means that drinking is allowed in the office beginning at 10am, and, more importantly, it’s the day of the week for Reader Finds, our bevy of collective celebrity flesh from around the Egotastic! Reader globe. It caps off our Maslow pyramid of needs, not to mention stimulating a few areas around the base.
This weeks Reader Finds includes a highly promising look at Taylor Momsen hanging with a porn star, WWE diva Kelly Kelly flashing nip, Katy Perry in a highlighted bit of headlights, Jessica-Jane Clement hot and topless, Shannon Elizabeth in a classic topless shoutout, Adrianne Curry NYE cleavage, Rita Rusic finally without a bikini top, Lily Aldridge down top, and Kristen Stewart luscious butt shots. It’s an assemblage of the amazing.
Check Out All the Must-See Reader Finds »
This may be the final year before the End of Days, in which case, I most definitely want to spend much of that remaining time with my very favorite Victoria’s Secret lingerie models who are ringing in the big-twelve with tons of sextastic lingerie photos in their year-opening catalogue pictorials.
A man could do much worse for himself in his time before meteoric armageddon than playfully happy betwixt the silky little nothings worn by uber-hotties Candice Swanepoel, Lily Aldridge, Erin Heatherton, and the vastly underappreciated Lindsay Ellingson. There’s no way the Mayans imagined this kind of sextastic power on earth when their calendar ran out of pages. In fact, if they had Victoria’s Secret back then, they might have a calendar sitting on their wall that looks very much like ours, and it runs fully until the end of the year. Trust. Enjoy.
Miley Cyrus drops some teasy self-pics at Fluff-N-Fold. (Celebuzz)
Lily Aldridge has a body built for bikini play. (Popoholic)
Megan Fox is slowly ditching Marilyn. (HuffPo)
Lindsay Lohan set to host jet setter NYE party. What could possible go wrong? (TheSuperficial)
Big mammaries, little restraint. (TheChive)
Alessandra Ambrosio pregnant again…dammit! (GossipCenter)
A mega-tribute to Sofia Vergara cleavage, this sounds good. (SocialiteLife)
The actual airing of the Victoria’s Secret Annual Fashion Show on CBS is something of a post-climactic letdown given that the catwalking of the mammaries took place several weeks ago now. But, when you bring back the pushed-up boobs of Miranda Kerr, Alessandra Ambrosio, and Lily Aldridge to host a viewing party for the event, then all bets are back on agains as to watchability. Imagine being the meat in the triple decker sandwich formed by this trifecta of lingerie-body hotness, smashing you on your couch while watching the tube. You might find yourself changing the channels on your remote and not even using your fingers.
Forget Valentine’s Day, the Christmas holiday really is the number one time of the year for lingerie models and their distant-gazed, hot-bodied performances. Enjoy.
Pardon me if we didn’t sleep much last night, or, at all, but the annual Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show is sort of like our Easter mixed with Christmas mixed with the day the ATM machine accidentally slips us an extra twenty by mistake. It’s a great day, evening, overnight. No, not because Kanye West and Jay-Z really broke it down during the Fashion Show performance, or because Nicki Minaj kept her stage dildo at home, but because of the massive mass of super hot lingerie supermodels called in from around the world to prance and dance and strut the runway at lingerie’s largest annual celebration.
Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio, Miranda Kerr, Erin Heatherson, Candice Swanepoel, Doutzen Kroes, Izabel Goulart, and Lily Aldridge all in the same room half-dressed at the same time? Lay out the scrubbable rubber mats if you wish to save yourself some cleaning costs (hey, we’re brutally honest here). I have no idea what the actual new styles are for the new season, but I do know that you ought take your time going through this bevy of magnificently hot women before, during, and after the big show to get your V.S. mojo working. I mean, don’t get so carried away that you end up buying your girl some pair of tawdry crotchless panties (rookie move) or that you start calling her Candice at the inappropriate moment, but most definitely, do enjoy.