Kimberley Garner

Kimberley Garner Sideboobs Are Sexpendables at London Premiere

See how I combined Sextastic with Expendables and made up a whole new SEO search term? That's why I earn my minimum wage dollars instead of loafing around like, well, like I do most of the time. Kimberley Garner inspires such genius creativity on my part, with her absolutely stunningly perfect petite framed body and whoever is brilliantly advising her on her choice of public wardrobe.

Kimberley specializes in sideboob for evening affairs, as she was showing off at the U.K. premiere of The Expendables Part Eleventeen, where the guys break into a drugstore late night for Bengay and hearing aids. I'm sure it's genius. Though not nearly as naturally magnificent as Kimberley Garner's blessed funbags. Enjoy.

I’d Let Kimberley Garner Be My Girlfriend (I Know, This Is Huge)

I really do have a thing for Kimberley Garner. She of the bikinis and short skirts flitting about various European capitals either for her reality show antics or just general promotion of being a hot girl everybody wants at their events. She put on a little short skirt to hoist the flag at the Paris to Barcelona Grand Prix which is basically a race of rich dudes in their cars figuring out clues at stops along the way. So more of a scavenger hunt than a road race really, a solid chance to get drunk each evening at various famous establishments along the way. Sounds fun to me, though I'm not sure I'd ever pull away from the starting line so long as my belusted Kimberley was flashing her legs and little upskirt peeks rolling around on the hoods of cars.

Whatever it is she's doing, she's doing it well. I can't stop wondering how nice it would be to spend an hour with her discussing life, love, and how that honey I just poured down her frontside will soon be hardening if I don't tend to it. I'm big on the chemistry of honey. Kimberely, call me. Let's make some magic. Enjoy.

Kimberley Garner Walking the Dog in Short Shorts and Short Dress, I’m Jealous of Her Dog on Both Occasions

Talk about living a dog's life. That pup belonging to Kimberley Garner has some seriously envious upskirt views all day long as they hot blonde reality star takes her dog for walks daily in her little outfits, hot short short (as above) or little summer dresses:

I'd absolutely have a doggie boner the whole day through. I might be projecting on that front. Still, you've got to feel pretty good as a canine looking up to notice your master is one super hottie with a nice little booty. I know my dog wishes he could swap owners. That ungrateful mutt. Though can't say I blame him. Kimberley, call me, let's do some dog walkies together. Wear something showy. Enjoy.

Kimberley Garner Red Hot Revealing Swimsuit in Cannes

I happen to have a little lust affair going on with blonde British reality starlet Kimberley Garner. So, I'm quite pleased to see she made the list of five hundred super hotties lining the streets and hotels and yachts of Cannes this week simply because it has all the best parties and every single paparazzi in Europe.

Kimberley is one of those girls who simply knows instinctively how to move around in a bikini or swimsuit. Every motion seems designed to make the gentleman ogler boil over with happy feelings, even if quite innocent in intention. She really has that special 'it' factor, as in, you're making it hurt. Kimberley, we need to see more of that hot tush soon please, I mean, if you happen to be taking requests. Enjoy.

Kimberley Garner Bikini Top and Short Shorts Hotness on the Blades in Santa Monica

Whoa, Britty hottie Kimberley Garner with her naturally petite boobtastic and her sweet little booty is now on our own left coast on a pair of roller blades looking all kinds os passion inducing. For those of you who love the ladies lovely and pretty and as Mother Nature made them, you'd be hard pressed to find a better example of sextastic princess than Kimberley Garner. You start putting her in her little pink bikini tops and short shorts on wheels, and she suddenly turns into a vision of classic faptastic.

I'm all for incredibly hot looking ladies from around the world coming to a beach near me in their little exhibitionist get-ups and smiling and laughing and pretending I'm not staring directly at them like they're on fire. For, in my mind, they are burning hot. And I do stare. Because I'm a concerned citizen and somebody needs to check for safety hazards. Enjoy.

Kimberley Garner Bikini Stripety Hot Down St. Bart’s Way

Kimberley Garner does have one of my favorite bikini bodies these days. A bit in need of a sandwich, but a frontside and backside that form a playground where I'd happily spend all my ogling tokens.

The TOWIE starlet was in St. Bart's for a photoshoot that had her in a red striped bikini and a hat that she desperately tried to keep on in a stiff breeze. I wish her bikini had been equally affected by the prevailing trade winds. We could really use a good bikini malfunction from Kimberley soon for the sake of my own stiff breeze. She is a lovely little blonde lass I must say. More, Kimberley, more. Enjoy.

Kimberley Garner Flashing Some Deep Dive Cleavage in the London Winter

Despite the extra 'e' in her name I constantly misspell, I remain a big fan of British reality blonde darling Kimberley Garner who in the summer time has one of the finest bodies to show off in these here parts, and as you can tell, she's not letting winter time in London slow her down from showing off a little something something to her adoring drooling male fans.

Kimberley may as of yet not expressed or professed any particular talents or skills other than having one super fine booty in a bikini and the penchant for showing off her yummy yabbos at public events, but I ask you this -- what other talents would be more important than these? I don't need her to be my doctor, just the very naughty nurse of my dreams. Everybody has a role to play in this great drama that is life. Kimberley does hers quite well. Enjoy.