Katherine Porto

Meet Katherine Porto, She’s Not Kim Kardashian


Here’s my general feeling on stanky people, you don’t need to make up stank about them, just make sure everyone can smell.

Last week, the Kardashian publicity team, and I mean, ‘team’, I think there’s about 879 of them, or some number as foretold in the bible related to the end of days, anyhow they were in a flurry and fluster last week shouting down rumors of new nekkid pictures of their meal ticket, Kim Kardashian, floating about the world wide web. The primary photo ‘leaked’ last week featured a brunette who kinda sorta not really looked like Kim, cooking eggs in the raw. Body raw, not eggs raw, that’s unsanitary. Anyhow, the photos got our Spidey senses tingling about veracity, and confirmed by a few of our fine feathered readers, we did determine that this photo belonged to a set from Colombian TV personality and all-around brunette hottie, Katherine Porto, form a pictorial in SoHo magazine circa 2009 where Katherine went about her entire daily routine, except without any top on. A great pictorial concept, for the record.

Now, Kim has got some problems. Or, I guess you could say, we got some problems with Kim, for she might be perfectly happy with herself, save for the hole in her life she keeps trying to fill with big, giant… hole-filling things. But we’re not going to heap onto the pile by creating scandal where it doesn’t exist. Because, surely, more real stuff is coming soon. Enjoy.