Kate Upton

READER FINDS: Kate Upton Bikinis, Shailene Woodley Nipple Flash, Melanie Griffith Topless, and Much Much More

 

Well, hello 2014. Welcome to Egotastic! This is going to be a fine and furry (and or shaved) year indeed. I can feel it in me bones. Rusty, creaky, and creme-filled as they are. As evidence of this pending annum's greatness, our first Reader Finds of the new year. That weekly event where we all gather round the carbon-neutral and air resources board approved campfire to throw in our own sticks and branches of celebrity sextastic. Sometimes, we also sing John Cougar Mellencamp songs, but that's after a couple cocktails.

This week's Reader Finds includes Kate Upton bikini glory hotness from The Other Woman trailer (thank you to EgoReader 'Zev' for this luscious affair), a renewed leer at Bianca Kajlich in her topless performance last year (blessings from 'Bob D.'), Nikki Ziering memorably funbags exposure (melons courtesy of 'Owen'), another ogle at Paula Patton topless in 2 Guns (redux goodness from 'Jeremy'), a throwback to Melanie Griffith topless lingerie looks from the 80's (wayback hotness from 'Erin'), Joan Severance in another topless skinematic event (good tidings from 'Benny'), thespianic Marine Vacth exposing her delicious teats (thank you kindly, good 'Daniel'), Naturi Naughton topless goodness (teat treats via 'Nate F.'), Brooklyn Decker  infamously showy GQ photoshoot (one of my faves from 'Dave'), Emily Ratajkowski barely covering her hot boobtastic (oh, Emily delivered by 'Stoney'), Fanny Francois in a crazy hot lingerie shoot (such sweet female forms by way of 'Tonya'), Tilda Swinton topless on the big screen (Tilda ta-ta's handed over by 'Nelly'), Shailene Woodley quickly flashing nipple in her new film (eagle-eyed by 'JR'),  Natalie Dormer topless in Rush (inspired by 'Tony C.') Emily Ratajkowski again, this time quite topless (ooh la la by way of 'Katy'), Miley Cyrus grabbing her own ta's in a candid (muchas gracias to 'Jose Luis' from FB), Helen Mirren bare in one wacky movie (spotted specifically by 'Layne'), Kayslee Collins topless modeling pics (from her devotee, 'MSG'), and Sascha Read super cleavy in lingerie (from her superfan 'Trey'). Enjoy.

Kate Upton Playful on the Beach With Boobs and Buttockals

Kate Upton makes any photoshoot a fun photoshoot. She could be shooting a commerical for home mortgage refinancing and give financially underwater homeowners a boner. It's true. Trust me, I've imagined it.

On the chilly beach over the weekend in a Sam Edelman commercial shoot, Kate got down to unbuttoning her top and flashing her bra covered cleavage, a healthy amount of legs and booty, and all-around looked like a curvaceous playful kitten in the sand. I guess this is why she gets paid the big bucks while when I roll around in the sand at the beach half-dressed, parents run for the parking lot while covering their children's eyes. Kate Upton, we need to beach together some time soon. Enjoy.

READER FINDS: Keira Knightley Topless, Heidi Klum Nippletastic, Lady Gaga Bare Boob, and Much Much More…

 

Sometimes I think to myself, no, stop, you readers are just far too generous with your skin-filled donations each week. Then I remember a little thing called the greater good. Something in Latin that means greater good that I never paid attention to in school. The concept that it's selfish to horde, gracious to share, and when it comes to the bare nekkid bodies of our favorite sextastic celebrities, downright saintly. How ever would I deny you that privilege? I shant.

This week's Reader Finds includes Kate Upton from Esquire being naughty with scissors (thank you to EgoReader 'James L.' for blonde bombshell goodness), Elizabeth Perkins topless on the big screen (big ups to 'OFC' for this cinematic gem), Hayley-Marie Coppin in her own topless film turn (kudos to 'Marcos' on these caps), Jaime Murray topless and wanton in Dexter (boob tube contribution from 'Damon'), my future adopted mom Michelle Hunziker from a bit back and super cleavy on Wetten Daas (pictures of my future mom transmitted by 'Steven'), 70's softcore legend Sylvia Kristel topless in skinematics (dropped herein by 'Rose'), Laura Gemser and Michele Starck topless in more throwback classic cinema (film buffed up by 'Louis'), Keira Knightley topless and getting it on with Hayley Atwell in something very Britishy (pirate-ess pics purloined by 'Oseh'), Courteney Cox in a classic 90's sextastic Mark Seliger photoshoot (from friend of Egotastic 'Josh P.'), Heidi Klum in a couple nipple baring body paint shots (offered up by 'Aaron'), Euro model Freja Beha Erichsen quite nekkid in black and white (arty goodness from 'Mike S.'), Olivia Wilde in a bikini top on location (hottie candid from the hands of 'Eric'), Lady Gaga bare boob in a Mario Testino shot photo (Gags funbag courtesy of 'Estebo'), Mika Lovely so lovely and topless (faptastic flesh provided by 'Sonja'), Playmate  Irina Voronina topless in Reno 911 (blonde jugulars dialed up by 'Randall'), Selena Gomez leggy boudoir promo pics (stellar find by 'Ray D.'), late night cable queen Shannon Whirry topless in a late night cable operetta (wayback goodness via 'Dean'), Liberty Ross topless art house chic (openly condoned by 'Patrick'), Ali Lohan modeling pics (a rare find from 'Dave'), the crazy hot Genevieve Morton in lingerie (silky blessings from 'John'), purportedly Alyssa Campanella, Miss USA, in a blonde wig and topless for something artsy (contributed by good guy 'Harushkupo'), another look at ingenue Morgan Saylor in her topless moment in Homeland (honed in on by 'Nathan'), Portuguese extreme hottie Sara Sampaio topless in a modeling shot (thank you quite kindly, 'Chris), and a plea for the beauty of Linda Cardellini (from her big fan 'Josh B.). It's more than a handful, it's a dive right in full. Enjoy.

Kate Upton Red Hot Award Winning Cleavage Down Under

You don't even need to tell me what the trophy is for, just go ahead and give it to Kate Upton. I presume it's for best use of the boobtastic at a formal public sporting event. Just s guess based upon gazing into the blessed chestal goodness of Kate Upton for going on three years now.

Kate was in red with a silly hat for the Melbourne Cup down Australia way looking all kinds of blonde bombshell turned Pretty Woman for such a regal event. Dressed up, dressed down, or preferably just undressed, Kate knows how to draw the eye to her fine female form. I even kind of dig the hat, I might just ask her to leave that on even as we play bad horsy and stern but loving jockey during the big race. Enjoy.

Kate Upton, Miley Cyrus, and Doutzen Kroes Lead List of Hotties at 30th Annual Night of the Stars

I think this particular gala is related to the fashion industry. There are so many upscale events taking place this time of year, I really can't keep track. My iCal calendar is just overloaded with events that I'm not personally invited to, but I know will be bringing out the hotties worth gawking in their general direction.

Like last night's Annual Night of the Stars event in The Big Apple. There were sextastic decked out sights a plenty. But the bodacious Kate Upton, the crazy media popular Miley Cyrus, and MILFtastic Doutzen Kroes stole the evening for me. I'd be happy to have danced with any one of them last night. And, by dance, yes, I mean, sweaty hot making of the sexy. I don't dance, but fine women do inspire. Enjoy.

Kate Upton Bodacious Cleavage Highlight the Action at the U.S. Open Finals

I guess there was a tennis match going on too. Who could really pay attention as Kate Upton, the new taste of New York, flashed a healthy dose of her chesty goodness at Flushing Meadows during the finals of the U.S. Open.

I'm not exactly sure how the gentleman ogling men were supposed to keep their eyes on the not extremely exciting back and forth rallies on the court rather than the front and centers on the blonde bombshell. But, then, there are better men than I. But nobody who knows how to use a set of stadium binoculars better than I, I assure you.

Kate Upton, please attend more sporting events. You make them better. Enjoy.

Kate Upton Is So Damn Hot I Want to Cry

On the off chance you happen to be a tremendous follower of the faptastic Kate Upton, our friends at WWTDD have a simply hot young vision of Kate Upton as a sexy teenager photoshoot that is a must addition to your visual library. Seriously, you must see.

If you're not a fan of Kate Upton, why are we talking again? Just kidding, you can still come to Thanksgiving dinner, you're just going to have to sit at the kids' table and eat peas. Enjoy.