I know you all think I'm crazy for collecting women's magazines, but who's laughing now, when both Kate Upton and Doutzen Kroes appears super sextastic among the pages of Vogue UK for 2013.
Now, you might have you own best case celebrity sextastic sandwich, but I'll tell you this, if I'm getting just one for eternity, I might just choose Kate Upton and Doutzen Kroes, the question is, will they choose me back? Enjoy.
Damn, Kate Upton is so effin' hot. How hot? Well, enough so that you're going to be watching her in an artsy, stylish, fashionable photoshoot for Vogue Italia, because when Kate Upton stares alluringly into the camera, while caressing her own body beneath some modern but revealing wardrobe, well, all you're going to be thinking about is merging your peanut butter with her chocolate, if you catch my drift.
The power of Kate Upton compels you to enjoy.
My Dearest Kate,
As you are well aware, it's been nearly two years since we first laid eyes on your barely legal form and wanted to do many barely legal things to your bouncy blonde and bodacious body. That's two years of intense feelings, unrequited passions, and more dirty gym socks than even Jerry Sandusky could smell in one Saturday evening private party sitting. In short, it's been rough.
Now, you go and do this. A Twitpic of your epic cleavage barely contained in your bra behind the scenes of your V-magazine shoot. And that face. Oh, that face. The kind we would want you to pretend to make as we moved from tube sock on floor to tube steak in heaven, as we become as one, like two shooting stars colliding in a cosmic explosion of light and anti-matter and reproductive juices.
Kate Upton, we're calling you out. You're hurting many men, and Sapphic leaning women, all innocent victims in your sextastic visual wars. No, we don't want you to stop, we want you to show us your bare funbags and let us exit this world with a smile. Enjoy.
Kate Upton could squat down and drop a stanky deuce on my front lawn and I'd watch with wide-eyes and a slackjaw. And that says much more about her uber-hotness than it does my personal dirty play fetish.
There's literally nothing this young woman can do that's not incredibly arousing, including, I dare say, wearing clothes, as she does in the upcoming edition of Vogue magazine, where the blonde bombshell dons far too much cover-up for our liking, but we like, nay, lust her deeply nonetheless. It's simply not possible to resist to Kate Upton's allure, we tried for a couple minutes, and we did not like the feeling. Enjoy.
Kate Upton cleavage is not the perfect addition to any event, including, and most definitely, personal parties for two.
Kate showed up to the New York Film Festival, mostly I think because it's actually impossible to go out in any city these days without just accidentally walking into the middle of a film festival (let's put it this way, there are far more film festivals than good films). Nevertheless, the minute Kate shows up in a low cut, fantastic boobtastic revealing dress, it's more than a festival, it's a feast for the visual receptors. When you see Kate Upton, it's impossible not to feel ten million years of evolution churning inside your cordoned-off areas just yearning to fulfill your procreative destiny.
Such is the power of Mother Nature, and one of her fairest creations, cleavetastic Kate. Enjoy.
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Egotastic
![Pacific Rim - Official Main Trailer [HD]](http://cdn01.cdn.egotastic.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/16/Pacific-Rim-Official-Main-Trailer-HD-100x75.jpg "Pacific Rim - Official Main Trailer [HD]")
Kate Upton Sexy as Usual for German Vogue (We Give Thanks for Another Year of Kate Hotness)
I'm pretty sure we've seen some of these photos before floating about the Kate Upton hotness pics universe, but the entire pictorial in the current edition of Vogue Germany is yet another testament to the power of Kate Upton sextastic. Just tingle-inducing in little clothes, or even dressed.
As the year 2012 comes to a conclusion, and/or the entire world comes time to meet its maker, we can't help but reflect on all the fortunate aspects of our Egotastic! life. Kate Upton is most definitely on that list, making so many men just so incredibly happy with so much killer body. Enjoy.
KATE UPTON SO HOT SHE MAKES FAST FOOD RIDICULOUSLY SEXY