Jessica Alba

READER FINDS: Denise Richard Wicked Hot, Penelope Cruz Wicked Topless, Raffaella Modugno Wicked Nekkid, And Much Much More…

 

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And, we are back. We took a little reader mailbag break over the holidays due to the timing of the festivities, not to mention my new Guinness Book of World Records, um, record for spiked eggnog consumption. I wouldn’t recommend the challenge for the feint of heart or those who share lavatory facilities with other unfortunate souls in their abode. At some point, it becomes an entirely private matter. Nevertheless, the velveteen mail bag remained closed until this moment each week when we unveil several of our faithful viewers most poignant prurient contributions. A litte big of skin filled tricks we like to call, Reader Finds.

This week’s Reader Finds includes Danielle Panabaker hot bosom (thank you to EgoReader ‘Kid’), model Alana Marie flashing her teats for Treats (kudos to ‘Eric C.’), Anais Pouliot and her French model friends topless (provided lovingly by ‘Devon’), Denise Richards in her iconic Andrew MacPherson tank top shoot (ever so so hot via ‘Denis’), Diane Franklin topless in the vastly underrated Last American Virgin (80′s throwback via ‘Ellen’), Russian born hottie blonde topless babe Elis Len (thank you kindly to ‘David M.), the gorgeous Emma Glover giving a New Year’s ta-ta’ salute (oh, me so happy thanks to ‘Evan’), Gina Carano outrageously sweaty hot for GQ (lust lust lust made possible by ‘Adrian’), Jessica Alba in her busty Campari calendar poses (Alba anytime delivered by ‘David D.’), sextasitc model Joyce Verheyen topless and luscious (much ado about funbags from ‘Carlos’), Julie Delpy topless in her French American skinema (lovely melons dropped off by ‘Aaron F.’), the hot bodied Lake Bell topless in her most classic scene (tons o’ ta-ta’s submitted by ‘Jerry’), Leighton Meester lovely as always (ingenue allure via ‘Cameron’), Maggie Gyllenhaal topless in her cinematic tubular turn (floppy happies from the mind of ‘Stephen D.’), Patricia Arquette topless and flaunting (sweaty puppy previews by ‘Stan’), Penelope Cruz and her epic pair exposed (muy caliente, gracias para ‘Todd R.’), Italian Miami bikini hottie Raffaella Modugno posing nekkid (dual kudos out to ‘Marsheat’ and ‘Anzio’), Susan Sarandon topless celluloid throwback (Susie Q’s tossed into the mix by ‘Letty’), Tiah Eckhardt topless Nordic naturals in S Magazine (this is a heavenly visual treat from ‘Erika’), and Abbie Cornish topless on the silver screen (lovely bath lovelies donated by ‘Holt’). It’s a New Year’s Reader Find mouthful, with two feet and a tether ball rope required. Take it in, scratch, sniff, enjoy.

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Jessica Alba Green Screen Asstastic Stripper Dance for Sin City 2 Production


There’s something truly magical about these production shots of Jessica Alba crawling along the fake stripper catwalk set agains the green screen for Sin City 2. Obviously, the film itself represent a hyper-stylized animated graphics hybrid peek on Jessica and other lovely ladies in the movie, but this behind the scenes look at Jessica with her butt in the air in garters and stockings. Um, I think I just erected my own sin city if you know what I’m saying.

Jessica Alba is definitely firmly ensconced in good girl Brentwood mommy camp at this point. Her risque visual days are for the most part behind her most unfortunately. But this single moment in time, this memorable bit of skinematics, well, the ladies might try to bury the sextastic for the sanctity of MILFhood, but I can tell you from experience, it’s like trying to hide the One Ring from Sauron. Good luck. The Egotastic eye sees all. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Sin City 2

Jessica Alba, Kate Hudson, Ashley Benson Among the Hotties Showing Off for Baby2Baby Gala

I don’t have time to look, well, the energy, but I’ll assume Baby2Baby is some awesome cause perhaps serving babies everywhere. Maybe like some milk delivery service. Something worthy of bringing out the super hotties in Hollywood to support. And boy did the lovely ladies of Tinsel Town come out in cleavy droves to this event looking incredibly.

Try on for size Jessica Alba, Ashley Benson, Kate Hudson, Jordana Brewster, and Molly Sims for a little sextastic aperitif. All of these ladies looking more than stellar, all well worthy of carrying my child at some point in the future, maybe even starting today, ladies? Oh, the decked out hotties all fecund and ready to help me amass my small army of Egotastic offspring. My heart swells with pride. Let’s just say it’s my heart for now. Hot moms really are heaven on earth. Enjoy.

Jessica Alba, Jennifer Lopez, and Elisabetta Canalis Highlight the Mommy Hotties at the Pumpkin Patch

Every year the sweet looking moms head to the Mr. Bones Pumpkin Patch in West Hollywood to get some pumpkins for the little ones in front of as many cameras as possible. Uber-MILFtastic Jessica Alba even took her kids two days in a row, because you know, eleven hours grabbing a pumpkin when you’re in kindergarten simply isn’t enough. I could hardly complain about this obvious publicity gesture for every mid-October it brings out the sextastic motherly types such as Jessica, Jennifer Lopez, Elisabetta Canalis, Jaime King, and Fergie to traipse around in what they believe to be chick but functional mom wear and smile for the cameras. I kind of dig this annual tradition.

As you may know, I was touched inappropriately in a pumpkin patch as a child. It was by large bird of some kind that fought me over my choice of pumpkins as a small child. That evil flying bastard won that round, but I vowed to eat lots of winged creatures for dinner ever since that day. I like to think I got my revenge. Now, I’m able to return to the pumpkin patch without so much traumatic recollections. Albeit, a single man roaming around the pumpkin patch is pretty bad for your reputation. I try to make it work by dressing like a scarecrow. Enjoy.

Jessica Alba Tame and Sweet and Ever Hot for Redbook

I’ll be the first to admit this is a rather innocent portrayal of the uber MILFtastic Jessica Alba for the ladies magazines. But I’ll be the second to insist that anything Alba gets my motors running, my boat set to sea, and me figuring out how to pull down the shades with just my teeth.

Shot by James White, these rather family oriented photos of the wildly attractive Jessica Alba are simply how I imagine her looking in our virtual Sundays together in the park while everyone stops and stares and quietly mumbles, what the hell is she doing with that guy and couldn’t she do better. That would make me so happy. Jessica, let’s do this. I’ll put on my seersucker suit. You come in a summer dress with your billions in clean baby diaper fortunes and we’ll join forces in a picnic of sex and sandwiches. I’m in, you? Enjoy.

Jessica Alba Wears a White Bra Top Out in West Hollywood

I’m no fashionista, but it seems to me like Jessica Alba forgot to wear a shirt. She was spotted out and about in West Hollywood  wearing what looked a lot like a white sportsbra. Jess has what I call “Goldilocks Funbags”. They aren’t too big or too small but just right and they look delectable in this white bra thing. Because her shirt is missing you also get a peek at that lovely bare-midriff of her’s. She’s in really great shape and her stomach is nice and tight and toned. I don’t know how these hot people manage to never have a stretch mark or dimple on their bodies. I guess when it’s you job to be hot you concentrate on preventing all of that from occurring at all costs. Whatever she does to keep fit it’s working.

I hope that her pioneering work in only wearing a bra out in public is emulated by other hottie mchottipants ladies. She deserves the Nobel prize in sexiness.

READER FINDS: Angelina Jolie Topless, Stella Maxwell Topless, Jessica Alba Bikini, and Much Much More…

 
Jessica Alba Bikini Booty in Into the Blue
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While many in the world are preparing their storm windows for the coming apocalyptic freeze of global cooling, here in Tinsel Town we’re preparing for the curse of General Santa Ana and the devilish 100+ degree temperatures in October. Nevertheless, neither flop sweat or seat sweat will deter me from my weekly duties of opening the reader email bag and smelling the sultry musky goodness within. It’s like the perfume counter at Nordstroms, if everybody were mostly nekkid. That truly might be a mixed bag.

This week’s Reader Finds includes Jessica Alba in her underwater bikini (many thanks to EgoReader ‘Jacob’), Cristina S crazy hot and topless (muchas gracias to ‘GG’), Lady Gaga flashing her thong on a Greek stage (credits galore to ‘Glenn H.’), Patricia Arquette topless on the silver screen (tatas via ‘Bill R.’), the delightfully skilled Sasha Grey topless in skinema (whoa hotties provided by ‘Steve’), Carrie Otis topless hotness in classic throwback (delights dished by ‘Ems’), Kate Hudson booty on camera (hiney exhibition thanks to ‘Maribo’), Kate Upton in her cleavetastic first film role (udders provided by ‘Les P.’), Katrina Law full frontal for Roman glory (kudos kindly to ‘Spencer’), Vanessa Paradis in her hot and super topless days (lovely dish whipped up by ‘Solomon’), Lene Nystrom topless and on top (tusen takk to ‘Hector’), Alice Aufray topless modeling goodness (blessings of the boobtastic from ‘Tony’), Macarena Lemos topless from down Sudamericana way (so much hotness by way of ‘Tess’), Sophie Howard and Sophie Reade doubled down DD treats (oh, my oh my’s from ‘Lenny’), Kelly Monaco topless and wet (goodness via ‘Bill P.’), Ellen Page showing a little skin (thank you kindly to ‘Michael G.’), Lea Thompson almost nipple slip on DWTS (eagle eyed by ‘Casey’), Angelina Jolie topless in Foxfire (Jolie jugs courtesy of ‘Johnny’), and last but not least, the delicious Stella Maxwell flashing her funbags (a lovely contribution from ‘Chris’). It’s a bunch, but you can handle it. Enjoy.