Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Bikini Fun And Other Fine Things To Ogle

Jennifer Lopez is still one of the hottest women on the planet. (Huffington Post)

Rita Ora and her funbags are on the cover of Cosmo. (Drunken Stepfather)

Nicola McLean‘s boobies are magic, like unicorns but better because they are ta-tas. (Hollywood Tuna)

I don’t like her movies, but I do like Katherine Heigl‘s cleav. (Popoholic)

Playboy’s Amanda Paige is hotter than your girlfriend. (COED)

Kevin Smith looks weird. (TMZ)

Lieschen Botes has an unpronounceable name but a very nice rack. (Celebslam)

Jennifer Lopez And Iggy Azalea Going Booty To Booty At The We Can Survive Concert

Jennifer Lopez and Iggy Azalea had a booty off onstage at the We Can Survive concert in LA. The veteran buttmaster Jennifer showed Iggy how the big girls shake their thing. Jen wore a short silver outfit that showed off plenty of that legendary butt. Iggy, who is no slouch in the booty department, was wearing a pair of short shorts and stockings. They made a splash a couple of months ago by shaking their rumps in a sweaty room for Iggy’s aptly named Booty video. I watched that thing on a loop. Maybe it’s the Latin man in me but I was transfixed by those bouncing gluts. The two of them should go on tour and call it Bootypalooza or something like that. I would shell out serious money to see that and I’m not really a fan of either of their musics.

I’m glad that Jen has taken Iggy on as her butt padawan. She has much to learn but maybe one day she will be as powerful as her bootymaster.

Jennifer Lopez Puts The Hot Concert Booty Into Canada’s We Day

We Day in Canada is described a a day for youth empowerment. I’m not so sure that’s even such a good idea. I was once a youth and the last thing I needed was power. Sure, I wanted it, but looking back on it, had I not been a disenfranchised struggling powerless teen, I might have actually been dangerous. Nevertheless, if you’re looking to feel youth empowered, you could do worse than checking out Jennifer Lopez and her crazy hot MILF booty on stage in Vancouver for a We Day concert. I don’t know, I feel ten years younger already just seeing that perfected Latina flesh twisting and turning so effortlessly on stage. How many 40-something moms do you know who perform full squats in front of strangers? Names and phone numbers please.

Jennifer Lopez isn’t getting old, she’s just getting more savvy. Not many artists understand the true source of their popularity and are able to keep playing to it year after year to bring in ever renewed audiences and fans. Jennifer knows exactly the source of her income. She sits on it daily. Oh, that thumper. Enjoy.

Jessica Alba, Jennifer Lopez, and Elisabetta Canalis Highlight the Mommy Hotties at the Pumpkin Patch

Every year the sweet looking moms head to the Mr. Bones Pumpkin Patch in West Hollywood to get some pumpkins for the little ones in front of as many cameras as possible. Uber-MILFtastic Jessica Alba even took her kids two days in a row, because you know, eleven hours grabbing a pumpkin when you’re in kindergarten simply isn’t enough. I could hardly complain about this obvious publicity gesture for every mid-October it brings out the sextastic motherly types such as Jessica, Jennifer Lopez, Elisabetta Canalis, Jaime King, and Fergie to traipse around in what they believe to be chick but functional mom wear and smile for the cameras. I kind of dig this annual tradition.

As you may know, I was touched inappropriately in a pumpkin patch as a child. It was by large bird of some kind that fought me over my choice of pumpkins as a small child. That evil flying bastard won that round, but I vowed to eat lots of winged creatures for dinner ever since that day. I like to think I got my revenge. Now, I’m able to return to the pumpkin patch without so much traumatic recollections. Albeit, a single man roaming around the pumpkin patch is pretty bad for your reputation. I try to make it work by dressing like a scarecrow. Enjoy.

Jennifer Lopez Sports Bra and Hot Abs Flashed in Hollywood!

Wow, I mean, MILFtastic forty and faptastic wow. Jennifer Lopez flashing her wicked tight and toned mommy tummy in Hollywood and some sweet cleavage in a sports bra and stretch pants just blocks from where I work slash nap. This is quite the tingly feeling. We see Jennifer flaunting her sweet bodily wares when prepped for shows or concerts, but to see the smoking hot and sextastic bodied mom just candidly on the streets looking so stellar, my heart is beating double time.

Jennifer, you are an inspiration to women everywhere, you know, speaking on behalf of all women. Okay, to men at least, the gentleman oglers who truly appreciate a woman in her 40’s who looks absolutely spectacular and fit and sultry curvy. I actually think I might cry. My beautiful Latina. You do captivate me so. Enjoy.

Jennifer Lopez American Idol Cleavetastic Appearance

Jennifer Lopez has more than got it. She done got it. And got it all over. Including some truly wonderful cleavage she was showing off at an American Idol event in Los Angeles. I’m not sure what the event was, perhaps the American Idol funeral if we should be so lucky, but I’m guessing more so a promotional event for the umpteenth upcoming season. That show may never die a natural death. Still, it brings us such wonderments as Jennifer Lopez and her MILFtastic sweet views in showy gowns throughout the year. That’s more than enough to get me to stop bitching about craptastic television I only have to watch when visiting my niece.

Jennifer Lopez, don’t every let anybody tell you to start wearing more clothes. They’re wrong. Enjoy.

Jennifer Lopez Asstastic Wild on Stage in Singapore

Jennifer Lopez has quite the life. She’s somewhere in the world on any given day flashing her amazing MILFtastic thumper on stage half-nekkid and lip-synching into a microphone for screaming fans. That’s not too shabby as far as careers go. Not that it beats blogging, but it’s close.

Of course, to make this lifestyle work, you need to be in your 40’s with the asstastic of a 20-year old booty model. And J-Lo delivers that whacking thwacking booty every single time she hits the stage. They’re not coming for the auto-tuned music. They’re coming to see the butt slapping goodness. Okay, like one kid is coming for the music. But he probably gets made fun of at school. Enjoy.