Elisabetta Canalis won the dubious honor this year of being billionaire Richard Lugner’s date to the Vienna Opera. It’s somewhat of a celebrity coup to get tapped by the skeevy old rich guy to be his showoff date to this annual upscale event in Austria. And there’s a fairly nice paycheck included. So why not make the most of it, as Elisabetta Canalis did in a cleavetastic hot red model body built dress.
You know seeing Elisabetta Canalis always reminds me what a dumbass George Clooney is, not to mention gives me tingly feelings in the regions where my mom used to tell I should only allow doctors to touch. I was too young then for her to add in, and Elisabetta Canalis, if you should be so lucky. I’m not sure I shall ever be that lucky, but just know, Elisabetta, I can describe in vivid detail and colored pencil drawings precisely how it happens. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Splash
I can’t help it. Every time I see Elisabetta Canalis I think of George Clooney thinking to himself, I can do better. That leads to a roller coaster of personal emotions that ultimately ends with me drinking an Oreo Cookie milkshake and watching Vin Diesel movies. That kind of confusing.
Elisabetta showed off her chesty model goodness at some important Italian related event last evening and looked like ten million dollars. If I had ten million dollars handy, I would have made an offer to spend five minutes on the balcony with her smoking unfiltered cigarettes and discussing our most shameful secrets. Alas, I have six bucks in my pocket and it has Subway written all over it. So, I ogle. And with Elisabetta Canalis, the pleasure is all mine. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: FameFlynet/INF
I guess every girl gets over Clooney at some point. Former model girlfriend to The George, Elisabetta Canalis, got married to somebody who is probably more handsome and seriously banked than I am over the weekend in Italy. Just kidding about that more handsome part. As if such a thing even existed.
I give Elisabetta credit for getting the best revenge possible, which is to look absolutely amazing, have one sextastic fine female form, and giggle a lot and make many babies. I can definitely help with that last part in the event the new husband starts to fire blanks. Just saying, I made a future king of England, I can make a future Italian male bon vivant who doesn’t need to know who his real father is. It’ll make him more gritty and interesting and give me some Elisabetta Canalis stories to tell in my golden years. Good for you, Elisabetta. And, good for us. Enjoy.
Well, well, well, what do we have here. My middle school science teacher used to say that before he cuffed me hard across the head. Now I used it to explain the pangs of eyeball pleasure at the sight of Italian model hottie Elisabetta Canalis removing her bikini top for a blessed adjustment, candidly revealing her bare boobtastic atop a boat parked outside an Italian beach resort. She’s not actually sunbathing topless, but she sure is taking her sweet time to put her bikini top on, providing the gentleman oglers in the area with telescopic lenses the opportunity to feast peeps upon former George Clooney motorboating territory.
Elisabetta Canalis has been topless before, but essentially in stage photo shoots for fashion magazines that smell like French hookers. Not that that’s a bad smell, mind you. Now, the chance to see Elisabetta’s bare funbags quite peeping Tom like is really just a thrill. Thank you, ill fitting string bikini tops. You really are the best. Enjoy.
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Go on George Clooney. Go get married. I’m happy delving into the trail of the forgotten, at least, that you have forgotten. Incredible hotties like Italian model Elisabetta Canalis. We’ve been drooling over Elisabetta for several years now. I’m not sure if it’s her crazy hot looks or that killer body or the little outfits she prefers to model, such as this Lormar lingerie shoot, but the entire package is working for me.
Elisabetta, if you were my girl, I’d treat you like a princess. I mean, literally, probably hide you in a high tower that only I can visit. I am rather possessive, but, thankfully, I have a very short attention span. It would be the best fifteen minutes of castle tower confinement you have ever known. Just so hot. Enjoy.
When Elisabetta Canalis sticks out her bosom so proudly in her bra, I can think only one thing. Well, two things, but being a gentleman of the highest order, I’ll skip right to the second — Elisabetta Canalis is so damn hot, how could a man possibly dump her? I know we’ve been through this George Clooney banging-the-sextastic-world rant before, but I just can’t run the scenario in my head where a man faces a woman like Elisabetta in her lingerie and tells her she’s just not his cup of tea any longer.
Oh, how I’d kill any one of you in a Russian sauna for the chance to drink Elisabetta’s tea, let alone sip her cups. Enjoy.
I’m tired of lamenting all the beautiful women George Clooney has cast aside. I can’t tell if it makes me jealous or nauseous or murderous with intent any longer. I just find it disturbing I suppose that any man could ever toss aside the blatant bodily goodness of a woman like model Elisabetta Canalis
. The Italian model looked smoking hot once more in her bikini on a summer vacation. With models it’s actually hard to tell when they’re on vacation actually, as opposed to us white-bodied pale manatees burning by the pool with too much liquor in our bodies by 11am. We’re far more obvious. And far less hot than Elisabetta, former girlfriend to George. Mofo. Enjoy.