Outside of bare nekkid and prone, there’s perhaps no finer looking pose for a hot mom than in a tiny outfit riding a bicycle with a basket. I’m sure there’s something to be said for my twisted Freudian interpretation of this quite innocent visual, and that thing is that I’m really truly in lust with Doutzen Kroes riding her two-wheeler in Miami Beach.
Bikini and little top, super short shorts, and a hot mom on a bike and I am ready to pedal myself to the nearest private spot for a little Wrist and Relaxation. It’s simply unfair how alluring Doutzen looks on her transport, likely imagining some mundane errands on her to-do list, though I’d like to imagine she’s thinking about making the sexy while popping a wheelie. So many potentials when wheels are added to the fantasy mix. Enjoy.
Doutzen Kroes simply doesn’t get enough attention. It’s hard to stand out in the V.S. Angel circuit, considering the lingerie company has now gone full tilt with 15-20 of the world’s hottest model in their regular lineup. But Doutzen deserves some top flight consideration for her stellar hot body, alluring looks, and the way in which she has turned mommyhood into just another stepping stone into the heavens of the sextastic.
Featured in German Vogue, Doutzen has that rare appeal for a celebrity model who can turn a women’s fashion mag spread into something must-see for men. While some photographer was shouting out to her silly phrases like ‘be the angry mother falcon’ and some nervous nellies from the wardrobe department were making sure her designer outfits were perfectly askew and abstractly offset, we care only for Doutzen. For a goddess of the female form who has it going on from head to toe and some very fun parts in between. Enjoy.
Hard as it may be to believe, given the chill in the air outside, and the fact that those beer bottles you left outside to chill for twenty minutes and forgot are now but cracked, saddened, ruined bottles of drinks that will never be drunk, but, we are in the height of bikini season. Not just the sextastic celebrities flooding the southern outline of our nation and even south of the border in their skimpy two pieces, but all the major manufacturers of delightful little bikinis now shipping to the retailers in time for Spring Break and the start of normal folk bikini time.
Along with the migration of tiny top and bottom apparel comes the onslaught, the delicious onslaught of bikini catalog shoots from our friends at Victoria’s Secret, who throw in a little lingerie as well for a whole lot of love, as featured on the super hot Doutzen Kroes (above) and the uber-sextastic Candice Swanepoel in bikinis below.
Truly, this is the season of our greatest content. Enjoy.
Well, the parade of angels continues in St. Bart’s under the watchful eye of Victoria’s Secret and the lucky bastard whose job is to to wipe sand off the well-oiled bodies of the supermodels along the beach being photographed for the upcoming V.S. bikini category.
Alessandra Ambrosio stepped first in to the camera lens with a series of bikinis perfectly showing off her Pilates perfected MILFtastic form. There’s no doubt in our minds that Alessandra is one of the hottest moms in the world, and we troll a lot of PTA meetings looking for disenchanted and frustrated moms, so, trust me, we have a solid sense of these things.
And not far behind Alessandra, a MILF of her own, Doutzen Kroes promoting some V.S. beachwear, because even the angels in our dreams need to wear something when they run to grab another case of Red Stripe for us in betwixt long sweaty sessions of Inserting Tab A into Slot B back in the vacation hotel room. It was quite a little hot mama show going on down in the Caribbean island; a very good day for boys with binoculars. Enjoy.
I know you all think I’m crazy for collecting women’s magazines, but who’s laughing now, when both Kate Upton and Doutzen Kroes appears super sextastic among the pages of Vogue UK for 2013.
Now, you might have you own best case celebrity sextastic sandwich, but I’ll tell you this, if I’m getting just one for eternity, I might just choose Kate Upton and Doutzen Kroes, the question is, will they choose me back? Enjoy.