Courtney Stodden evicted is not a phrase you’d expect to hear everyday. Maybe every other day at most. But, despite being the biggest boobed contestant in The Celebrity Big Brother UK House, and also flashing her bare top at some point for the cameras, whoever it is who decides these things kicked Courtney out of the house and of the show. So she made her walk of shame, which she seemed pretty well-versed in, showing off the chestal boulders that will no longer be readily seen by British TV viewers.
I can’t say if people laughed or cried or just kissed two shillings goodbye. But I can say everybody is excited for what comes next for Courtney Stodden, I mean, within the range of adult fare possibilities. I kid, Courtney, I kid. Sort of. Enjoy.
To call Courtney Stodden flashing her bare boobs to the ‘secret’ cameras on Celebrity Big Brother U.K. an accident is sort of like calling Courtney Stodden a celebrity in the first place. I’m not buying it. Still, even waiting a year and a major implant surgery past her barely legal birthday to finally see Courtney’s fully exposed udders, I guess it was cosmically worth it. Kinda sorta?
It’s easy to hate on Courtney Stodden, though if we’re being honest with ourselves, she’s doing precisely what we anticipated she would beginning three years ago, so outrage seems a stretch in the least. I once again defer to the Ferdinand principle in all such controversial matters. I prefer to sit under my cork tree and smell the flowers and watch the bare funbags without a need for complications. Enjoy.
Apparently, this is the first time Courtney Stodden has been outside the United State, but she and her new gargantuan funbags, along with her elderly husband, jetted over to England for Courtney’s appearance and entrance into the Celebrity Big Brother House U.K. I might have to question use of the word ‘celebrity’, but there’s no questioning what Courtney brings to the voyeuristic camera show. She was showing most of it off, barely contained in a very tiny dress that was certain to leave some British TV censors clutching their pearls.
I’ll say this for Courtney, she’s never boring. I mean, she probably is super boring, but when making a scene in public, she knows how to make a scene alright. Enjoy.
I think I’ve spotted the new game plan for Courtney Stodden. Get enormous new breasts. Show off enormous new breasts whenever possible in public. I can’t say I’m ever against any plans related to the public exhibition of the boobtastic. I’d hate to ever be the guy who starts putting conditions on which women can or can not show off their chests in public, when they can do so, how much, etc. I always worry that once you start drawing lines, the curves go away. And God knows, we have plenty of people in our world who spend much of their life’s energy trying to get women to cover up. Having said that, Courtney Stodden might be close to jumping the shark. Or, at least smashing that shark on the head with a giant pair of DDD implants until it swims away bruised and battered to go warn all its shark friends.
Courtney was doing her new routine outside the Chateau Marmont last night, flashing ten acres of chest-front property for any and all to see. I think even her creepy old husband was trying to put a shawl around her, to no avail. But, avail ourselves of these visuals we shall. For we never forsake the funbags, lest Karma ever deem to take them away from us. Enjoy.
Courtney Stodden believes in many wonderful causes. But none so great as the cause of garnering attention for herself and her new bundles of DDDelight as she did once more at the PETA veggie hot dog promotional event in Hollywood.
I’m not exactly sure why people are eating veggie hot dogs, as opposed to say, just regular old vegetables (or a hot dog for that matter), but I suppose PETA feels this might save an animal’s carcass somewhere along the lines. What it meant for Courtney Stodden was the chance to wear another highly noticeable skimpy bikini in public while opening her mouth for a tubular shaped prop.
I guess everybody was a winner at this event. Including the onlookers who left the event feeling hungry for a juicy burger. Enjoy.
I’m not exactly sure where Courtney Stodden is going with this, but I suspect the cameras are going to follow.
I know many of you will write in and say stop giving this attention seeking <insert unkind word> even more attention, but you fail to see that all the world’s a stage and we are merely players. Though that make be the wrong Shakespearean quote, or not Shakespeare at all. But Courtney Stodden already is Courtney Stodden and I guess we played some role in that happening, but that’s like blaming winter for making things so cold. That’s what winter does.
We do so like big mountain sized chest playthings here. It’s such a tough call between base instinct and refined culture. We tend to go with the former. Sort of the same forces driving Courtney herself to show more and more of her freshly created new immense ta-ta’s. Look away if you must, but they are still there, I assure you. Enjoy.
Remember that sweet innocent little Courtney Stodden with dreams of singing and acting in Hollywood? What ever happened to that unadulterated teen bride of yore?
Gone I guess. Replaced by one big-topped barely legal showgirl who made her way over the weekend to a trashy Hollywood party where she managed to be the center of attention by sheer force of upgraded size boobtastic. She wasn’t wearing much save for a fishnet dress that revealed most of her form, the natural and the artificially baked.
I suppose she got exactly what she wanted, and, say what you will, but you know if you were at the party, you’d be cranking your neck to see too. Quit judging me! Enjoy.