I can’t help but feel like The Other Woman has been coming out in theaters for about ten years now. Maybe just because we’ve been tracking this film and it’s boobtastic cast for so long now during production. But it’s finally here. Which means red carpet. Which means big cleavage shows for a chick flick about affairs and fooling around and revenge and other things women love that I don’t quite understand. But I do totally get Cameron Diaz in a low cut dress, who along with Kate Upton being her bosomy self and a surprise chesty appearance from the funbags of Nicki Minaj, made for one ripe melon filled red carpet in Los Angeles.
Now, whether or not your woman makes you go to see this movie, that’s between you and your conscious. Yes, I know, Kate Upton and Cameron Diaz and bikinis and yadda yadda. We’ve seen all the photos. Do as you must, my wayward son. Just, please, don’t explain yourself after the fact. It’s in the details where we lose our souls. Enjoy.
Much in the same manner I like to workout once a month before my hot date, or, you know, taking a girl to Arby’s and telling her she can order anything off the menu, Cameron Diaz took in one last sweaty filled workout before her Vogue modeling session in St. Bart’s. You certainly want to make sure your booty and body are looking just model perfect before you unleash them to the millions of Vogue readers who expect perfection.
Sure, you’ll get some help after the fact from the post-production folks at the magazine, but Cameron Diaz wants to give them her best to work with. So a tight top and some shorts and some serious workout before putting on the bikinis and various other more fancy beach outfits that will encourage women to buy something from the store. This isn’t Cameron’s first modeling rodeo. She knows what she’s doing. And we know how to watch her doing what she does. We’re like a well-oiled machine. Enjoy.
Oh, it’s blurry alright. Cameron Diaz was way way out in the waters off the coast of St. Bart’s where no cameras could possibly see her changing in between her shoots for Vogue magazine. Oh, but they forgot a little something called telescopic lens technology and raw desire, that overcomes a few nautical miles distance. At least, to capture the pixelated essence of Cameron in between wardrobe changes. We didn’t quite get the full view we were looking for, just the precipice.
Still, this strikes me as a good omen for the coming week that we might capture the model blonde out in the middle of the Caribbean almost coming out of her robe. Pure luck. The kind of luck we don’t just give thanks to, we sacrifice the full suovetaurilia to be sure the godd continue to bless us with the fortune of strong visuals. Yes, I’m sensing good week indeed. Cameron’s hooters were desperately trying to back me up on this. Enjoy.
When Penelope Cruz asks you ‘Have you been bad?’ You. Say. Yes.
That’s really the only major insight I have about the new trailer from Ridley Scott and Cormac McCarthy‘s upcoming joint The Counselor. It looks seven to ten kinds of ridiculously badass and they should just take my dollars now.
Sure, it’s OK to be skeptical about the guy who made Kingdom of Heaven making a movie by the guy who wrote The Crossing. That’s fine. I can see that.
But, let’s look at it this way: the guy who made Gladiator and Alien has brought to life a story from the twisted mind of the guy who wrote No Country for Old Men. Sure, there are no aliens (wait, are there aliens?) super powers or comic book deep cuts, there’s just Penelope Cruz and Cameron Diaz going head to head (hopefully). And probably a warped villain of some kind who will chill the insides of our very souls.
That’s all we need from our movies, right?
Well, what do we have here. Three ladies who I would not throw out of my bed for eating crackers, or stabbing me in the eye for that matter. Of course, I will admit to putting a premium on Kate Upton rolling in the hay, but I’m not going to turn my nose up at veteran hottie Cameron Diaz or Leslie Mann for that matter.
The three relatively blonde ladies were bikini to bikini, in the Bahamas filming The Other Woman. That movie seems to have many many scenes, or maybe they’re just making stuff up as they go along as an excuse to get these ladies into their bikinis. We’ve already seen Kate Upton almost fall out of hers (oh, damn you almost!). Either way, I’ve already committed to spending my money to see this film. It could be horrible, but this production process deserves a ten-spot. Enjoy.
I can’t even begin to tell you how much sextastic celebrity skin you’re going to see here this coming week. I’m not sure if we’re in the Dog Days of Summer yet or not. Nobody’s explained that one to me, but we are most definitely in the enduring heat weeks and that means more sweet flashing than just about any time of the year.
As you know, at the beginning of each week I seek out a harbinger of good and naughty tidings. I can think of no finer omen than the sight of Kate Upton and Cameron Diaz filming The Other Woman in the Bahamas, both their booties perched in the air. Some people look to the stars for perfect alignment of the universe, I look to asstastic. Oh, baby, this is going to be a great week! Enjoy.
There is no love greater than that expressed each week here on these pages with our communal gathering for Reader Finds. I mean, not young love, not true love, and not even monkey couples picking fleas out of each others fur. All pale in comparison to the scope of sentiment represented by a bunch of EgoReaders sharing their favorite celebrity skin-filled pictures for the benefit of the whole. It’s like a socialists dream, if only the socialists could stick to just sharing hot nekkid girl photos.
This week’s Reader Finds includes Brazilian reality stars Nicole Bahls and Fani Pacheco flashing serious booty (thank you to EgoReader ‘Liman’), hot South African Tanit Phoenix onscreen and quite artsy topless (blessings from ‘Ray H.’), three decade throwback to Adrienne Barbeau topless in Swamp Thing (kudos to you ‘Harv’), the underrated hotness of Anna Friel in a black and white photoshoot (black and white and hot all over from ‘Devon’), Melanie Raimundo covered topless for Zen Garage (supremely nice treats courtesy of ‘James’), Pell James topless in the wicked Pawn Shop Chronicles (submitted deftly by ‘Amanada’), Joanna Page now famously topless in Love Actually (handed over by ‘Donny’), veteran shower Christa Campbell topless on screen in the early 2000′s (ta-ta’s provided by ‘Stoney’), a way way back tribute to Bonnie Bedilia topless in a 1960′s film (whoa baby by way of ‘David M.’), the leather-clad shapely asstastic of Alex Morgan (righteousness from ‘Theo P.), Cameron Diaz topless on the beach back in the day (loves me some Cameron boobie, so does ‘Michael’), and new Adam Levine fiance, the supremely hot Behati Prinsloo quite showing off her funbags (big ups to ‘Chris’ for this fine peek). It’s a handful, a mouthful, and if you do it right, just a couple of tears. Enjoy.