Ashley Greene

Ashley Greene Tickles Our Most Enjoyable Bone With Simple Hotness

As you know, it is our destiny to spend one long weekend together with uber-hottie Ashley Greene tucked away at our usual Comfort Inn Suite with nothing but cough lozenges and a Party-Pak of Taco Bell Chalupas and have at it until we are too sore to move, or the police arrive and kick down the door and rescue Ashley. Hopefully the former.

There's just something about this Ashley Greene that drives us completely bonkers, even when dressed so innocent as she appears in the November issue of Riviera magazine. We just want to take her out for an ice cream cone or dance with her at the prom or strap her into a sex swing or something safe and family-friendly like that. Enjoy.

Ashley Greene, Maria Menounos, and Halle Berry Lead List of Hotties at Variety’s ‘Power of Women’ Estrogen Soaked Gala

Now, you don't need to tell anyone here about the power of women, well, hot women specifically. We've dedicated our lives for the past many years to the yearning supplication before the knees (to more ably peek up their skirts) of wicked hot celebrities. Granted, the folks at Variety may be conceiving of a broader definition of female power at their celebration, but, then, they're overlooking the fundamental leverage women have over men in 99.9% of interactions. We men can't say 'no' to sextastic ladies.

For example, oh, blessed hot Ashley Greene who was in attendance, Maria Menounos for whom we want to build a shrine of marble or plywood with a faux marble finish as it's more economical, Halle Berry who we've been lusting for two decades now, Serinda Swan, brunette woman of super ogle-worthiness powers, and let us not overlook Azita Ghanizada, Afghan-born thespianic hottie who we first drooled over in some guest appearances on Entourage.

You want to talk about the power of women? Take a look at these ridiculously hot women and see if you can ever imagine not doing everything they say with a big dumb smile on your face. We must concede. Enjoy.

Olivia Wilde, Ashley Greene, and Jennifer Garner Melting Hot at ‘Butter’ Screening in N.Y.

The film Butter seems like it's been around for a while now, showing at festivals and slowing rolling out into theaters I guess again this Fall. If you check today's Reader Finds, you'll see some nice screencaps of Olivia Wilde with some outrageous nipple pokes from the film.

Olivie Wilde was on hand with co-stars Jennifer Garner and Ashley Greene last night in The Big Apple for a promotional screening of the film about a girl who is wicked good at carving butter. And the ladies were wicked hot. Hot enough to melt the butter in your pants. Actually, that's not butter. But you get the idea. Enjoy.

Ashley Greene Reprises Pure Hotness in DT Magazine

We've seen these photos before I do think, somewhere in the pictorial circuit from some other magazine, but when it comes to Ashley Greene and the wicked thoughts she inspires within our 97% libido by weight brains, well, it's worth another look.

In these ridiculously hot photos of Ashley Greene running in this month's DT Magazine in Spain, we see the young sweet delicious actress looking exactly as I imagine she will appear as we saunter together, hand in bound hands, into our Comfort Inn suite for a weekend of nekkid Hungry Hungry Hippo play.

It will be more than a ball-snatching game, it will be a tournament of raw appetite. Enjoy.

Is It Wrong to Want to Chew the Denim Off of Ashley Greene?

There are few things in this world that I want to do more than ravish (or is that ravage? or both) the hot tender and delicious body of Ashley Greene, who is most famous for a movie series I've never seen, but with whom I'd like to make some beautiful music.

The sextastic actress was flashing more leg over the weekend in the Big Apple in short jean shorts that left me feeling like a stake had been driven through my heart, and by stake through my heart, I really mean an uncomfortable squeeze around my dangling bo-bos. Something about this woman inspires me to want to be a much worse man, abscond with the heaven-sent hottie to the nearest lodging-by-the-hour facility, and pay for 120 minutes in advance. That's commitment. Enjoy.

Ashley Greene Is Pink and Hot and Good to Go All Over for ‘Apparition’ Premiere

It's been a good long while since we had a full-on Ashley Greene motel weekend fantasy, but I feel a doozy coming on after seeing these pictures of the ridiculously hot young actress decked out and flashing cleave and legs at the red carpet premiere of Apparition last night in L.A.

I'm picturing Ashley and myself, her hands bound in some kind of soft, yet secure binding, at her own request, natch, some kind of silk tie that is barely noticeable by the front desk clerk at the Travelodge right off the freeway where I check-in with just Ashley, four wash-cloth sized towels, and a bag of Ore-Ida frozen crinkle cut fries and we play a little game I like to call, Baking the Taters. We won't emerge from our alley-view second floor room for 36-hours, leaving behind nothing but happy memories and the smell of Idaho a few weeks past tuber harvest season. Oh, Ashley, you do inspire. Enjoy.

Ashley Greene, Maria Menounous, and Olivia Munn Make Us Want to ‘Do Something’ Very Indecent at Red Carpet Event

Seriously, you can not have a big shindig called the 'Do Something' event and then parade out the likes of Ashley Greene, Maria Menounos, Olivia Munn, Lea Michele, Nicole Murphy, Sophia Bush, and Bella Thorne, and not expect us to be imagining that something we'd most definitely want ro do (Bella exception of course due to her age, despite her looking much older, we do have rules).

Now, I think they mean Do Something good for your neighborhood or planet or something like that, and we certainly do intend to do that, starting with making some awesome looking babies with Ashley and Maria, that will be our legacy to the planet. Other people can work on the ozone and such so our beautiful babies can breathe. Everybody must do their part. Enjoy.