Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan Probation Revoked! Lilo’s Future Filled With Far More Lez Than Dick

TMZ is breaking with news that Lindsay Lohan has had her probation revoked due to criminal charges being filed for Lindsay lying to cops last summer when she claimed that she wasn't the driver of the Porsche that slammed into the truck on PCH, you know, despite everybody in the known universe knowing Lindsay was the driver.

Lindsay Lohan, the daughter of two really effed up drugged-out hustlers (hi, Mr. and Mrs. Lohan) and former actress turned hop-heavy sleepy dreamer, could soon be returning to the all-female finger-probing showers of the Los Angeles County correctional department. A place that is not quite as nice as we dream in our private time dreams.

Lindsay Lohan Not Drinking… Except for That Bottle and a Half of Vodka a Day.

According to Lindsay Lohan dad of the year, Michael Lohan, his daughter is consuming between a bottle and a bottle and a half of vodka per day, that is, in between the pills she uses to sleep or wake herself. Michael Lohan is insisting that the posse around Lindsay is enabling her dangerous consumption and demanding some kind of emergency intervention.

So hard to know who to believe in this domestic dispute. Lindsay Lohan is obviously flailing about on something stronger than clove cigarettes and corn pops (did that once for a whole weekend sophomore year of high school, I don't recommend), at the same time, Michael Lohan is a sleaze dad of pretty epic proportions.

Read the latest on the Lindsay Lohan Intervention (without Lindsay) on TMZ.

 

Is That Lindsay Lohan Looking Almost Good at Beverage Pimping Event

Yep, that is Lindsay Lohan looking almost retro-hot, we dare say, back in L.A., away from all her Big Apple legal, family, drug, drinks, glommer, and posse problems (yes, we said posse, not pussy, jesus), and paid to pimp out the Mr. Pink Gingseng Drink, which I guess we just now pimped too, only we didn't get paid.

Wearing a minidress that flashed a little cleave, and almost a little beave, Lindsay looked downright presentable back in red hair, perhaps to differentiate herself from her mom who has tried to look like Lindsay by going blonde so she can order off her account at the local bodega. Is there still hope for Lindsay? Meh, probably not so much, but we still do. Enjoy.

Make-Out Time is Over! Lindsay Lohan and Mom Dina in Drunken Nightclub Brawl

Oh, these mother daughter love affairs never last too long I suppose. One minute, you're wasted and kissing your equally wasted emotionally disturbed mother and the next minute you're in a nightclub brawl over who gets the limo and mom is scratching a gouge into your leg and the police are called.

As you know, for as much as we want to blame Lindsay Lohan for all her troubled behavior, it only takes one look, and breath smell from mom, not to mention dad's retarded caveman like track record, to know that Lindsay was doomed from the start.

Check out all the details on the Lindsay-Dina Lohan brawl on TMZ.

P.S. Who is paying for all these 911 responses?

 

Lindsay Lohan Stars in ‘The Canyons’; Worst Trailer Ever or Doesn’t Matter Because She’s Going to Be Topless? (VIDEO)

There Will Be Boobs!

Well, for us here, it does not matter. With near confirmation that Lindsay Lohan will be topless in the upcoming Paul Schrader indie film, The Canyons, we'll be seeing it one way or another. But, between this past summer's trailer which showed nothing of the film, and this blurry, out of focus, shaky 8mm looking handheld, it's hard to say what this movie will even be. Could be a total eff u by the filmmaker to completely throw off forecasts, or, the film could be just that bizarre.

Just so long as they don't cut Lindsay's topless scene, we'll likely give it a begrudging thumbs up in the very least. Enjoy.

Lindsay Lohan Attacked (Not Really) and Amanda Bynes Locks Herself in Cupcake Bathroom; You’re Welcome, New York

What a weekend for celebrities who fled from L.A. to N.Y. to find some sanctuary from the media and bad influences in Hollywood. Yeah, that plans has only worked -- never.

Amanda Bynes who people are refusing to publicly state is clearly heavily caught up in some kind of mind altering substances, locked herself in a cupcake bakery bathroom for half an hour before firefighters were forced to extricate the trouble 20-something celeb.

And, honest citizen Lindsay Lohan got into a late-night, post-nightclubbing kerfuffle with some idiot star-stalking Congressional staffer dude she invited to party back at her hotel room after the tool started taking cell phone pictures of Lindsay doing something Lindsay would rather not have published. Probably something like reading to schoolchildren, though, it was 1:00am in a hotel room party, so, maybe not. So, Lindsay did what so many of her effed up in the head celebrity hotel guests have done before her -- she pulled the fire alarm.

Lindsay claims the dude assaulted her and wanted him charged; according to our friends at TMZ, the police found no evidence of an assault and dropped all charges. Do these people ever get billed for wasting police time and dime?

Lindsay Lohan Hides from the L.A. Po-Po by Partying Hard in N.Y.

When news broke that Lindsay Lohan was wanted for questioning by the L.A. police in the case of some missing jewelry from a swank house where Lindsay had been partying the night before, well, Lindsay did what any good citizen would do -- she bought the first plane ticket she could to the Big Apple and skeedaddled out of town. Not exactly O.J., but a little lesson learned on the value of fleeing when it suits you best.

Now, unlike your more veteran felons, Lindsay didn't exactly lay low in the Big Apple, simply not her m.o. Nope, the former ginger heartthrob hit the clubs in Manhattan in bare-midriff fashion, liquored (or something) up, then seemed confounded when the paps actually wanted to take her picture. Say 'cheese' (or, you now, 'your honor, I'm innocent, I swear'). Enjoy.