Well, today is the day. Lindsay Lohan topless, like you’ve never seen her before. I mean, you’ve seen her topless before in Playboy and that was kinda sorta her, and we’ve had the various wardrobe malfunctions through the years, and there have been some artsy photoshoots for magazines, but I guess this is the first real fully topless in a craptastic indie film ogling opportunity for Lindsay, in between her rehab stints.
There were many stories out about production nightmares during the making of The Canyons, and many more problems with critics who got an early glimpse of the film mostly feeling like vomiting inside their brains, but, either way now, the movie is in the cinesphere officially, as are Lindsay’s luscious big chest puppies.
Lindsay was once a beautiful young woman. That seems so long ago. As we reminisce, why not look at her floppers in The Canyons as a little mammarial tribute. Enjoy.
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Lindsay Lohan is making the most of her 25th hour, about four more weeks, until she hits mandatory rehab in a facility that most of us would likely call a luxury vacation. But it won’t be luxurious for Lindsay who will have to scrap and scrape and bribe her way to get her fix. But that’s not for a few more weeks, and in the interim, Lindsay is having herself quite the time, including flashing some ginger cleave at the Scary Movie 5 premiere. This is Lindsay’s latest grand cinematic effort and she’s going to pimp it with a smile regardless of how fast the world around is collapsing.
While we truly hope Lindsay finds sobriety this time around, and makes her way back into some meaningful, if not more sextastic, commercial ventures in the future., well, we can’t hold our breath. So, for one day, we’ll just take her sweet cleavage on the red carpet. Enjoy.
I’m still not exactly sure how Lindsay Lohan got sentenced to court ordered rehab, immediately after serving a sixty day pre-rehab stint of partying hard around the world, but, I guess that was the judge’s decision. Either way, Lindsay is down to her final four weeks and out pimping Scary Movie 5, one of the last films that would have her, including a stint on Letterman, where Dave got her a bit uncomfortable with his rehab related questions he wasn’t supposed to ask.
Click to see Lindsay Lohan questioned by Letterman about rehab.
Nevertheless, Lindsay did look somewhat put together in her leather skirt outside the show, considering she just returned from a quite busy week in Brazil. Just getting back across the equator was something of a milestone. Oh, that someday you possibly return to prior form, Lindsay. We will light a candle. Enjoy.
Sometimes I feel like Lindsay Lohan matches her bikini colors to her mood. Or, maybe she’s just really hungover in the morning and grabs whatever she can find laying on the floor. I wouldn’t blame her for doing the latter since that’s my standard mode of dress each morning. But if it’s the former, then why so blue, Lindsay?
Yes, your head is throbbing and your tongue tastes like cotton balls dried on the back of a desert tortoise beneath the baking hot sun. And, yes, you’re headed to court ordered rehab shortly for a 90-day drying out that will likely include some serious bouts of D.T.’s. And, okay, yes, you’re far too risky for any production company to ensure you in a TV show or movie any longer. And, finally, you have bruises on your leg indicating some type of rough recent encounters with various stationary or moving objects.
But, you’ve got the sun and the sand and the surf and that blue bikini and the world is still watching, so smile, smile, smile. Enjoy.
There are so many things that don’t mix well with Lindsay Lohan these days (cocktail references excluded).
One has always been bras. Lindsay Lohan hates bras. That’s one of the things we love about her. The other thing is apparently helicopters. Because Lindsay got so shaken (not stirred) by her helicopter transport down on her Brazilian pimping and partying before rehab mini tour that she didn’t notice her boob fell out of her dress.
Now, I’ll deny this in court if ever questioned in a criminal matter, but I pretty much know when my junk is hanging out bare outside my clothes. But Lindsay, some yaws, pitches, and rolls, and out comes the righty. If not for Lindsay’s long locks, she would be fully and udderly exposed. Enjoy.
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Lindsay Lohan is celebrating her last few hours of freedom from her latest court verdict to pimp a few store openings down Rio, hit a few clubs, and imbibe the local refreshing bottled water out partying late night. Now, I’m suspecting if you test those water bottles, they may not come up entirely pure. I’m guessing 80 proof.
But whatever Lindsay was pounding, it seemed to be working, as she looked better than she has in some time. At least based upon her mug shots and court appearance and stumbling gaits home after hours.
We’ll miss Lindsay when she’s in rehab. But not as much as her dealers I suspect. Enjoy.