Bryan Cranston and Aaron Paul Join Julia Louis-Dreyfuss for Pawn Parody Emmy Promo

And It's Really Good
It might even make you consider watching the Emmy Awards...

Generally speaking, I'm about as interested in watching the Primetime Emmys as I am in watching professional darts over on ESPN2. And in case you didn't pick up on my sarcasm, just so we're clear, I have absolutely no interest in watching professional darts over on ESPN2.

However, if the promo the Television Academy yesterday is any indication whatsoever of the direction the actual awards ceremony is going to take, I'm all in. Because the promo is brilliant. Breaking Bad stars Bryan Cranston and Aaron Paul reunite to play slimy pawn brokers trying to make a deal with Julia Louis-Dreyfuss who, playing herself, has come into their store—Barely Legal Pawn—to sell her Seinfeld Emmy. The thing is filled with little winks and references that to Breaking Bad, which makes you, the viewer, feel smart. But mostly it's just funny because Cranston, Paul, and Louis-Dreyfuss are all damn fine actors.

The 66th Primetime Emmy Awards air live on ABC on Monday, August 25, at 8PM ET/ 5PM PT.

Here’s ‘Grand Theft Auto Online’ with Another Slice of DLC (VIDEO)

GTA Online- San Andreas Flight School Update
At last, the hei... oh, wait.

Grand Theft Auto V is approaching its first birthday now, but Rockstar are still pumping out the DLC updates. They’ve got an impending next-gen release of the game to pimp out, after all.

As is customary with these bonus content packs, we need to take a moment to bitch that heists are still nowhere in sight. And the moment’s over, so now let’s have an ogle at what is on offer.

Feast your eyes, ears and gonads on The San Andreas Flight School update. It’s all far too manly and Top Gun mocktastic, as we learn to fly some rather badass jets and showcase our patriotic (your country here) flag-based parachute bags.

That aside, there are all the usual fancy-ass thingmabobs and doohickeys you expect from GTA Online DLC. New vehicles (of the land and air varieties), tweaks to the payouts of certain missions, all kinds of smaller additions. Check out the piss-takey trailer above for more details.

Via Destructoid.

Sarah Silverman Topless, Deborah Ann Woll Making the Sexy, and Maggie Gyllenhaal Nipples Highlight the Boob Tube Roundup (VIDEO)


What is this magic here? Sarah Silverman in an unexpected topless turn in Masters of Sex on HBO. I guess when I heard she was going to have a recurring role on the series it should've been a head's up that everybody gets topless on that period piece show. Still a mighty nice surprise for a Boob Tube Roundup of the best of the skintastic in the weekend in celebrity ta's.

Joining Sarah in the BTR is Deborah Ann Woll somehow not flashing funbags during a True Blood sex scene, Maggie Gyllenhaal nipples out to play in BBC's The Honourable Woman series, Laura Donnelly and Catriona Balfe topless in the time traveling drama Outlander, and Andrea Bogart and Brooke Smith topless in Ray Donovan on Showtime, It was a big week on the small screen for big views. Indeed. Enjoy.

Gamescom 2014: Getting Stabtastic in Notre Dame with ‘Assassin’s Creed: Unity’ (VIDEO)

Assassin's Creed Unity
Enigmatic stealthy-stealth hood? Check.

Elsewhere at the show, some of the big next-gen names were flaunting their wares. One that’s always a ball-busting highlight is Assassin’s Creed, Ubisoft’s much ballyhooed stealth 'em up.

The previous release, Black Flag, took the series to all kinds of odd, piratey places. Why we were suddenly drinking rum and blowing the balls off of any ship that dared approach us was a mystery, but we went with it. You haven’t lived until you’ve man-tacularly whipped your shirt off and hunted a big ol’ shark with a harpoon, after all.

The question, then, is how will Assassin’s Creed: Unity build on the huge, dynamic parkour playground that was the last game?

With an addition dose of badassery, apparently. Here’s creative director Alex Amancio, introducing us to one of Unity’s early missions. It’s a merry, homicidal romp through Notre Dame, complete with all the ‘confessional kills’ and death-defying leaps into wheelbarrows full of horsecrap you could ask for.

Watch as dynamic sub-objectives and other fancy-ass new tricks are showcased.

Jessica Alba Makes Everything Hot, Even Baseball (VIDEO)

Since we ended last week with an explosion of confusing, if not tingling, feelings whilst peeking Jessica Alba as the lady flashing her panties above the subway grate, why not start this week off by ogling Jessica Alba as the perfect sports girl, so damn hot just trying to throw out the first pitch at the Dodgers Game on Sunday.

Now, there's a good chance you're not a Dodgers fan, but the entire world is pretty much a fan of anything Alba, especially these days with hot mommy showing off her lacy underthings. Jessica Alba can move the world with a smile. With a nekkid smile, she could probably destroy worlds. It'd be worth it. Enjoy.

Gamescom 2014: ‘NHL 15’ Brings Us Hockey Done Right. Apparently (VIDEO)

NHL 15
How's this for realism?

You know that canny little trick developers like to pull? The one where they bellow about trailers being made ‘entirely from gameplay footage,’ only for that to be a big ol’ steaming pile of BS? Yep, EA Sports love that one. Here it is again, fresh from Gamescom.

But let’s not be the cynical bastards of cynical cynicism we sometimes are. Whichever way you slice it, NHL 15 is looking more authentically hockeytastic than games ever have before. From what we can tell of this in-engine business, anywho.

Previously, we saw the spangly new realistic puck physics, and how they’d help the attempt to emulate the sport itself as closely as possible. Now, in this footage from the show, we see the atmosphere of hockey (yelling, burly dudes punching face, yelling to encourage more burly dudes to punch face) being brought to lavish life.

Yes indeed. These are crowd physics, right here. And that’s not even a thing, which shows just how revolutionary we’re being. Take a look at this suitably dramatic new trailer, as we await the game’s September 9 release.

Gamescom 2014: ‘Until Dawn’ Brings Creepiness, Craptacular Cliches (VIDEO)

Until Dawn
The horror!

Our Euro-buddies are right in the midst of Gamescom 2014, that E3-lite no bastard pays quite enough attention to. Well, zip up your flies and listen up, because we’re bringing you the picks of the show.

Beginning with Until Dawn. Now, we’ve all heard games promising to ‘reinvent’ their genres. Sometimes it happens, and we’re blown away on a tide of innovation that sends our brains dribbling out of our ears. The other 99.99% of the time, they’re just blowing smoke up our skirts. Not that we’re cynical.

If there’s one thing that doesn’t revolutionize horror, it’s a small band of dumbasses dicking about in a cabin in the woods at night. With a ouija board. And a homicidal crazy lurking around. That’s Lazy Scary Shit to Put in Movies for Dummies, right there. Still, we’re sure Until Dawn can make it work.

This PS4 title does at least have an unusual angle going on, giving you control of the destinies of these eight unfortunate souls. Who gets impaled in the nads by a pair of rusty secateurs? You decide! (If you’re listening, Big Brother producers, that’d be a great way to liven up the show. You can thank us later.)

Check it out.