Clara Alonso Models Lingerie, You Stare, It’s That Simple

Tall. Check. Hot. Check. Spanish. Si, check. Clara Alonso has been on the super sextastic radar since walking for Victoria’s Secret as just a twenty year old and now in her late 20′s she’s exuding double or treble the hotness back then as she takes on pimping the wares of competitor brand lady’s undies. Oh, man, she could sell water to a drowning man.

Featured in the Triumph Essence lingerie collection, the sultry senorita of my dreams and slightly less familiar in reality shows exactly what one statuesque brunette with a perfect body can do for bras and panties. Mostly make you imagine taking them off of her. But you can’t do that if you don’t buy them first. And now you see how marketing works. Hot girls and lacy underthings. It’s as simple as it is impossible to defend. Clara, you do this so very well. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Triumph Essence Lingerie

Gigi Hadid Even More Bikini Hotness, This Time With Stripes!

There’s perhaps no model as triple to quadruple booked these days than Gigi Hadid. The now twenty year old has a body in very high demand. I believe you know the answer to the question as to why. She was once more shooting bikini looks for somebody or other, flying the red white and blue and other bikini colors on her tops and bottoms and flashing one simply faptastic model form. She’s a natural.

I’m pretty sure she shot three major campaigns just this week. With zero campaigns of any kind to my name, she’s already bested my fledgling yet super long and unpaid modeling career. I have to give her the advantage in looks, body, smile, and passion inducement. She probably has better spelling skills too. I’m such a low bar as it turns out. But boy, would I make Gigi Hadid happy in ways that her tall hunky rich boyfriends of past, present, and future never will. I know secrets that drive women wild. Well, more angry than wild, but aroused just the same. Gigi, look me up, I’m on Tinder. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet/PacificCoastNews

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley Wears A Bikini Top For Self Magazine

Rosie Huntington-Whitely was looking like a model in an LL Bean catalog that I’d like to F. She appears to be yachting in these bikini top pics for Self Magazine. It makes sense. You expect someone with a posh sounding named like Rosie Huntington-Whitely to do a lot of sailing. What I do know is that her luscious boobage looks amazing in these pics. She’s got a nice pair of perkies that is certainly getting my buoy up. I don’t know if that’s an appropriate nautical term for the innuendo I’m trying to make but I think you get the general idea. What I am sure of is that I wouldn’t mind being stuck on a boat with a bikini clad Rosie. Wouldn’t mind at all.

There is something about a woman doing manual labor that does it for me. Maybe it’s that they get all sweaty and flushed. Don’t mind if I do.

Photo Credit: Self Magazine

Danielle Knudson Bare Midriff For Cleavy Catalog Finds

Professional hot person Danielle Knudson did an incredibly sexy photoshoot in some bare-midriff having cleavtacular outfits. She sported several cropped t-shirts that revealed her tight and toned tummy. And why not? If I had a stomach like Danielle I would show it off all the time too. It would be a crime to keep something that sexy hidden from view. But that’s not the only thing that makes these pics get my pressure up. There is also her glorious boobage. Oh, happy day! She’s got on a sundress, white so you know it will be see-through, and doesn’t appear to be wearing a bra. There is just a hint of sideboob and that is always a good thing, my friends.

I’m a big admirer of Danielle. Every time she comes across my desk here at Egotastic headquarters I get a big ‘ol smile on my face.

Photo Credit: Tobi Collection

Monika Jagaciak Arm Bra Unclad Hotness For Victoria’s Secret

Oh, you wicked hot Monika Jagaciak, now you’re modeling bikinis and bras for Victoria’s Secret. You already have invaded my mind with your young Polski passion inducing goodness. Now, you’re going to be in my catalogs and brochures and posters I see when I break in to the local V.S. store late night to do my own inventory checks. This girl is so damn hot she makes me want to learn enough Polish to learn how to beg properly.

Victoria’s Secret does kind of have a leg up and a hot body over the entire sextastic world. They’re just spanning the globe signing up super good looking young models like they’re going out of style. They’re not, but I appreciate the attitude. I wish I had a helicopter and some money for signing bonuses. I’d airdrop into Poland and find Monika’s hot cousins. It’s all about planning. Also, that signing bonus money. Working on it. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Victoria’s Secret

Hilary Duff Flashes Righteous Skin For Shape Magazine

Okay, so maybe these photos of happy go hottie Hilary Duff are a bit touched up by the hands of software. The freshly single former TV starlet has most definitely been putting time and energy into hitting the gym and ship shaping her fine female form for the dating game once more. She really is looking better than almost ever. Oh, Lizzie.

Hilary was the choice of the month for Shape Magazine which inspires women to be their better selves. With similar fervor to how I inspire women to instinctively remember their judo training and reach or their pepper spray. We all motivate in different manners. Hilary Duff has a large scale fan base of the males of the species dating back to her teen TV days. She won’t have trouble finding eligible bachelors lining up to take her out and try to examine her shape just a little bit closer. Good on you, Hilary. Stay away from pro athletes and you just might make this work out fine. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Shape Magazine

 

Becky G, Zendaya Coleman and Witney Carson Among the Trending Hotties at the Radio Disney Awards 2015

I must admit I’m not all too familiar with each and every one of the young starlets in the Disney stable of teen girl proteges. There seem to be a ton of them when they all get together for G-rated exhibitionist events such as the Radio Disney Music Awards, a completely superfluous event designed almost completely to simply promote their roster of talent. And talent they have.

Becky G, Zendaya Coleman, Witney Carson and many others of the girls seen on Disney shows as secondary characters, singing sextastic minstrels, or just plain old fashion All-American girls designed to pimp the Mouse House. They do primp quite well, even if there was a general restriction on anything racier than allowed in the 1950′s. A few of them made an effort to standout. These girls know their future holds something more mature in nature, having seen the past graduates succeed with skin. Ah, Disney. You give so much that you pretend doesn’t exist. It’s more calculated than ironic, all the same, thank you. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet