Gigi Hadid Arm Bra Can’t Hide the Hotness For Vogue Australia

Gigi Hadid is everywhere these days. Well, I should modify that to say Gigi Hadid is everywhere these days except for the seventeen places I would most like her to be according to my NC-17 rated REM state dreams. Someday. For now, she’s just appearing pretty much in every single magazine around the world, including Vogue Australia where she uses good ole (bad ole) arm bra to cover up her late teen goodies.

I must admit, while I’ve always had that hankering for a hunk-a Gigi, I did not see her professional career rising this meteoric. It’s almost unheard of really the speed at which she’s gone from pretty girl to professional model and pimper of fancy goods. Perhaps related to her family name or celebrity, or just the fact that she gets such overwhelmingly positive responses wherever her heavenly body appears. Probably a combo, though I care only mostly for the latter. She really holds all the tools for model greatness. And if she ever appears in any one of those aforementioned seventeen locations, she will simply be my goddess. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Vogue Australia

Alexis Bellino Pink Bikini for Real Housewives Big Tube Time

There’s not all that many real parts left to the Real Housewives ladies who have a penchant for the distilled beverages and going under the knife. That being said, you could do worse as a teen boy than living next to mom who has righteous fake funbags and a bikini body that will in the least get you thinking about where babies come from. I remember being fifteen and I don’t recall discussions among the buddies about whether or not the hot moms in the neighborhood were real or not. Nope. Singular was the mission and thoughts.

Alexis Bellino stars on the Orange County version of the horrific Bravo! reality series featuring drunken moms, parolees, and home wreckers. It’s a sad cynical venture, but, bikinis and bleached blonde hair and big tubes have to count for something among the 40-something divorcee mommy crowd. There is not merely one avenue on the road map to the sextastic. Everybody gets there by way of a unique journey. There’s nothing wrong with a busty neighbor mom who begins throwing them back early in the morning. Hope springs eternal. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet/Splash

Jennifer Lopez Crazy Hot Cleavetastic Mom Swimsuit Photoshoot For US Weekly

I don’t know what Jennifer Lopez is eating or drinking, but I’ll have some of what she’s having, if you know what I mean. I don’t even know what I mean. I want Jennifer to have it all. This Forties and Faptastic MILF has somehow managed to get even hotter and more alluring with age, providing yet another generation of boys the proper form of passage into manhood, ogling, leering, longing, and then some other stuff that you need to ask your parents about.

When you think Jennifer Lopez and US Weekly your mind doesn’t immediately go to images of a desperately hot mom in a set of revealing swimsuit photos. But now it can. I give you permission. And ammunition to play out any and all veteran sextastic scenarios involving J-Lo, her swimsuits, and you coming to deliver ice to her to cool her down during tanning. Nobody delivers ice anymore, but you might as well run with it and pretend she asks you to rub it over her burning body to help reduce the swelter. It could happen. Step one, find where Jennifer lays out in those revealing suits. Step two, find ice. I’m halfway there. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: US Weekly

Vanessa Hudgens Extreme Plunging Braless Cleavetastic in the Big Apple

Every day we’re seeing brunette petite hottie Vanessa Hudgens exiting her building on the way to her Broadway play. Every day she’s wearing something chesty and sweet and revealing and hiding her head from the waiting press. I don’t understand it. I mean, not the bosomy reveals. I most definitely get that part. Why the hiding of her beautiful face and the pride she should feel for looking so stellar in her sheer breezy braless outfits.

Today Vanessa probably has topped herself. At least her sidewalk work of the past few weeks. The combination of her low cut outfit and the lack of undergarments led Vanessa to be posing in the style of the European supermodels who do tend to flash much cleavetastic on their daily promenades and shopping trips. Vanessa’s own sweet ta-ta’s were on fine New York Spring display, like a Siren’s call to come and visit the Big Apple. Or at least come and take a peek at these perfect peaches. Now I’m just feeling hungry. Something’s grumbling. Just so hot, Vanessa. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet/INF/Splash

Yan Yi Bondage And Pasties, It’s Busty Chinese Goodness With the Perfect Hint of Naughty

Somedays you just need a hot busty Asian in various stages of bondage and pasties to kick start you engines. I call those days every days. I really could use a wake up call by way of the bodaciously curved Yan Yi, a Chinese glamour model discovered on our journeys to the Orient in search of the girls who drive men crazy on the Westside of the Pacific.

Yan Yi certainly has the gear to be a serious breaker of men’s bodies and souls, if not hearts and minds, or just bells and whistles. She really seems to know what she’s doing. This isn’t her first bondage and pasties rodeo. Certainly not the last one I’m going to imagine. When Mother Nature invented busty sextastic Chinese girls, she must’ve taken at least a brief break, put her feet up on the table, and just smiles at her handiwork. I would’ve bought her a cup of coffee. Job well done. Enjoy.

Zoe Kravitz Barely Covered In Tribal Bikinis for GQ

Zoe Kravitz has been showing up more and more wearing less and less of late. This is a good thing. The second generation sultry celeb has quite the naturally lean and mean passion inducing body which she brings to bear in her film roles as well as on the pages of magazines such as the current issue of GQ. Just a bikini and a whole lot of attitude for this back to nature minxy siren.

It’s easy to forget about Zoe Kravitz in your various tops lists of hottie dream girls. She does tend to disappear for extended periods of time where she gets missed, then lost. But when she makes her return in little animal bikinis, you can count on a whole flood of prurient emotions rolling back in. That’s how it is with all the good girls. Even more so with the naughty girls. It’s all about anticipation. Well done, Zoe. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: GQ

Bar Refaeli Asstastic Posing for Laisha

Nothing to see here. Just wicked hot Bar Refaeli posing with her perfect asstastic out like a beacon of hope and tingle for all the world’s gentleman oglers. I don’t believe I could even imagine a finer bottom side in my mind’s eye, which imagines fine bottoms about most every waking hour of the day.

I can’t tell you if these are brand new photos of the Israeli crazy alluring blonde model, but I can tell you they are making all nine of my non-frost bitten toes curl up with a mix of happiness and hope. She really is one of the wonders of the visual world. Featured in Laisha magazine, Bar lays upon some cars and other inanimate objects for which I am currently experiencing some unhealthy levels of jealousy. Oh, to have Bar Refaeli in revealing clothes resting upon your own posts and lintels. Ooh, my lintels just shuddered. So damn hot. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Laisha Magazine