Brazil Lost World Cup Because Of Mick Jagger

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bill-swift - July 11, 2014

This week Brazil got its ass handed to them in a World Cup match by Germany. It was the worst defeat in World Cup history. Critics have studied how Brazil's defense could have collapsed so completely. But the Brazilians know the truth. They lost because of a hex put on them by Mick Jagger. Yes, the lead singer for the Rolling Stones. It all started during the last World Cup in 2010 when every team Mick came out for lost big time. The Brazilians became convinced that the crusty old rock star was a jinx. This year Jagger continued his sucky picks by picking Italy and England over Uruguay, (both lost). But it was when he predicted a Brazil victory over Germany that the hex took on an epic power that took out the home team. Brazilians were not amused. As Yahoo Sports writer Brooks Peck explains,

"This was the first match Jagger attended during this World Cup and it just so happened to be one of the worst losses in the history of the sport. Clearly his powers of destruction are only growing stronger."

Who knew that Mick Jagger was a wizard? I wonder if he can do more than effect the outcome of soccer games? But I wonder if it is intentional? It was rumored in the 60's that he and Keith Richards sold their souls to the devil in exchange for fame, fortune, and eternal life. Clearly, all of that came true. But what if the Satanic side effect of the pact was that he then sucks at predicting soccer matches? Could be worse.

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