Sam Robeson - December 20, 2018
I won't always be here for you, but Bella Hadid will. Because she's a Japanese sex robot incapable of aging or love. Vogue does this pretentious self-fellating 73 Questions video with various Hollywood blowjob factories on YouTube, but none of them have provided my coworkers and me with the endless entertainment like this new one from Bella Hadid.
First off, count the number of hair flips. Just count 'em. There's five thousand. At the end she actually throws out her neck and crumples to the floor. Secondly, watch how she desperately clutches on to the poor goat obviously trying to run away from her. Robots are a known fear of goats. And third, here are just some of Hadid's lines that have dazzled and delighted us here in the office this morning:
I think butterflies really represent me
I'm just the butterfly of my family
I just love making art
My obsession of chocolate just now started
Pizza hut, dominos - anything sweet
I think kindness will always be in fashion
Watching my little brother collect crystals on the floor
Now fly away butterfly. Fly away and spread the word of those sugary sweet treats known as pizzas.
Photo Credit: Instagram