Sam Robeson - June 24, 2017
Bella Hadid is tearing through Paris like the publicity machine Tasmanian Devil wearing anything that sticks. Her style sensibilities have left her in a bra and bright orange 90's prostitute-inspired garb. Since Hadid looks like she was thirty in the 90's, it all just works.
The Japanese sex robot with something to prove wore her Orange is the New Whore ensemble to a party celebrating the Heron Preston Menswear Spring/Summer 2018 collection. If that means anything to you, then congrats, you suck. Hadid graciously warns anyone getting close to her vag to "Handle With Care." And with medical-grade exam gloves. The movie Contagion is closer than we think.
While fellow ho troll Bella Thorne strategically spins a tabloid yarn complete with intrigue, surprises, and plastic surgery that looks like it was purchased through Groupon, Hadid just fucking shows up. Thorne might be receiving Scott Disick for publicity. Hadid throws on funky shades and calls it a day. Something's amiss. Maybe she's innately interesting. Maybe the paps can't stop clicking on their cameras because they think she's Cher from the year 2040.
Hadid thinks she's somebody. She's got a tight bod, history with Lyme Disease, and millions of purchased social media followers going for her. All good things in this biz. Of course there's also the possibility that Hadid's been handled with care by every tabloid editor alive. The alternative to fucking a reality television star.
Photo Credit: Splash News