JackWebsite

Jack Tomas is a writer, filmmaker, and editor working in New York. He's originally from Houston, TX where he earned a BA in Theater and Communication from The University of St. Thomas. Later, he received an MA in Media Studies at The New School. Jack has worked several years as a professional filmmaker and his films have appeared in several film festivals including the Cannes Film Festival, The LA Comedy Shorts Festival, and The New York Independent Film Festival. He has also worked as a professional blogger since 2009 writing for Guanabee.com , Tuvez.com , Egotastic.com , and Directorslive.com . He lives in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn with his wife Marybec and two cats.

Solange Knowles’ Boobs Were Falling Out At Her Wedding

Beyonce's little sister Solange Knowles got married in New Orleans and the theme of the wedding appeared to be nipple slips. The lovely Solange wore a white pant suit kind of thing with a huge slit in the front. I wouldn't call what you could see of her funbags cleavage. It was more like inner sideboob with just a hint of nipple. Solange is pretty hot. I've thought so since I was forced to watch Bring It On: All or Nothing in which she starred as sassy cheerleader. Beyonce was also looking really sexy in a white dress that showed off those legendary ta-tas. No nip slips on her part though. A shame, really. I always thought only the bride was supposed to wear white at a wedding? I guess if you are Beyonce you can do whatever the hell you want.

I'm a little hurt that I wasn't invited. We're both from Houston and I used to see her dad all the time downtown. That obviously warrants an invite, right?

Weird Crap Sold On Coupon Sites: Ugly Christmas Sweaters

I live in Brooklyn, NY which means that I am surrounded by hipsters. They are everywhere. They say that in New York, rats outnumber the people 5 to 1. Well, the hipsters outnumber the non-douches 8 to 1. That's why this particular item gets under my skin. Soon the the invitations for ugly Christmas sweater parties will start to come in. This is among the most common hipster themed parties. Then you have to go out and find an ugly enough Christmas sweater at the thrift store that doesn't cost too much. Then you have to put on the damn thing and get on the subway and then everyone knows that you are going to an ugly sweater party and are therefor a douche. Luckily, with this Groupon, I can save myself a trip to the thrift store.

They come in Oscar the Grouch, Optimus Prime, or Ninja Turtle varieties. I think I'll get Optimus Prime.

Miley Cyrus Wears Only Red Pantyhose And Other Fine Things To Ogle

Miley Cyrus is topless in pantyhose for her new video. (Drunken Stepfather)

Tyga's new girlfriend Dollicia Bryan is pretty sexy, yo. (TMZ)

The new Fifty Shades of Grey trailer is hawt. (Huffington Post)

Toni Garrn unleashes her mighty cleavage. (Hollywood Tuna)

Jennifer Aniston lets out one satiny boob. (Dlisted)

Which one of these hotties will be the next Miss Colombia. (COED)

Emily Sears has some big 'ol fashioned funbags. (Celebslam)

Colleen Shannon Uses Her Jugs To Sell Expensive Water

DJ Colleen Shannon had her turntables out and spinning in this photoshoot for 138 Water in Malibu. Colleen started off wearing a tiny blue bikini that showed off those gorgeous knockers splendidly. But you know what makes a better top? If there is no top! She seems to have lost it in the surf and only had her hands to try and hide the massive bulk of those famous subwoofers of hers. Needless to say, there is all kinds of tasty boobie flesh sticking out of her tender little fingers. But let's not forget that booty, y'all. It's tight and fully packed. I often think on Colleen's booty and how magical it is. What I wouldn't give to snuggle up to those buns for a few minutes.

Paris Hilton was just named the top woman DJ at some awards show for DJs. I'm sure Colleen is feeling kind of sad. I'd gladly cheer her up.

Jennifer Lawrence Looks Red Hot Heading To The Late Show

America's sexy sweetheart Jennifer Lawrence was looking sultry in red on her way to the Late Show with David Letterman in New York City. The dress was short on both ends so you could see plenty of top and bottom. Ah, the famous Jennifer Lawrence cleav. Her Katniss Everdeens are part of the reason people love her so much. Who can forget their Academy Award winning role in American Hustle? They were amazing in that movie. She's also got a pretty awesome set of stems as well. Probably due to all that running around in the woods with Peeta or whatever for those Hunger Games movies. I also enjoyed their work in American Hustle. That movie was all about her boobs and legs.

Seems she had a bit of trouble with the crowds when she was leaving the show. That's the problem with big groups of people in New York. They tend to get a little booty grabby if you're not careful.

Nadine Leopold’s Sexy In Lingerie And Other Fine Things To Ogle

Freckly beauty Nadine Leopold shows off her stuff in this lingerie spread. (Hollywood Tuna)

Paris Hilton looking hot at the NRJ DJ Awards. (TMZ)

Julianne Hough is amazing in a white crop top shirt. (Huffington Post)

Heidi Klum covered topless for Sharper Image? Sign me up! (Drunken Stepfather)

Olivia Wilde stuns in a tight black dress at Horrible Bosses 2 premiere. (Popoholic)

Check out the best Victoria's Secret Christmas commercials. (COED)

Isabel Canete knows how to fill out a bikini. (Celebslam)

Awesomely Horrible Netflix Instant Films: “The Rocketeer”

Watch Video

Film is an inexact science. Sometimes a studio will invest a ton of money into a movie, market the hell out of it, and it totally fails. It just sits there like a turd in the wind and stinks. These films tend to get swept under the rug as a kind of embarrassment by the studio. It kind of makes them look stupid for having backed the wrong horse, as it were. But some movies bomb REALLY big and are REALLY embarrassing to the studio. The Rocketeer is such a film.

Billy Campbell stars as Cliff Seccord, a hotshot stunt pilot who is dating aspiring actress Jennifer Connelly. When some gangsters crash into his airplane while running from the FBI, they hide a super secret rocket pack designed by Howard Hughes in the hanger. Billy Campbell finds it and has ideas about using it to make money. We then find out that the gangsters stole the rocket pack under the pay of Timothy Dalton, who is kind of an Errol Flynn style movie star. Billy Campbell uses the jet pack to save his friend from crashing his plane and then the press call him The Rocketeer. Meanwhile, Timothy Dalton tries to woo Jennifer Connelly to try and get close to Billy Campbell. It turns out that Timothy Dalton is a Nazi spy, (DUM! DUM! DUM!) and he was stealing the pack for Hitler. All of this convoluted mess ends when Billy Campbell shows up to save Jennifer Connelly and Timothy Dalton is helped to escape by some Nazi troops that somehow managed to get into Los Angeles along with a zeppelin. He tries to escape but Billy Campbell saves the day with the rocket pack.

As you could probably tell from my synopsis, the movie is seriously convoluted. It's hard to keep track of who is after Billy Campbell. The mob, Howard Hughes, the Nazis, Timothy Dalton, the FBI? They all look alike to me. Even a good cast, great effects for the time, and a ton of money behind it couldn't save it from being a mess. Still, the movie is entertaining at points. Could be worse. It could be Cutthroat Island.