JackWebsite

Jack Tomas is a writer, filmmaker, and editor working in New York. He's originally from Houston, TX where he earned a BA in Theater and Communication from The University of St. Thomas. Later, he received an MA in Media Studies at The New School. Jack has worked several years as a professional filmmaker and his films have appeared in several film festivals including the Cannes Film Festival, The LA Comedy Shorts Festival, and The New York Independent Film Festival. He has also worked as a professional blogger since 2009 writing for Guanabee.com , Tuvez.com , Egotastic.com , and Directorslive.com . He lives in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn with his wife Marybec and two cats.

Soooo, Vampires Are Real

Blah!

I've gotten pretty sick of vampires. They've reached maximum saturation I would say. With Twilight, True Blood, Dracula Untold, etc. it's really enough already. I mean, it doesn't really matter, right? It's not like vampires are real, right? WRONG! Apparently, an archaeologist in Bulgaria has found a real vampire grave. The person was dug up in the ancient Thracian city of Perperikon and was found with a metal spike driven through their chest nailing them to the ground. They did this in order to keep the fiendish bloodsucker from rising from the grave to feast on the living. Nikolai Ovcharov, the head archaeologist said,

"We have no doubts that once again we’re seeing an anti-vampire ritual being carried out."

ONCE AGAIN? How many friggin' vampire graves has this guy found? Is it just in Bulgaria or do I have to worry about vampires in Brooklyn like that movie where Eddie Murphy had a mullet?

Emma Stone In “Cabaret” Lingerie Hotness And Other Fine Things To Ogle

Check out these sexy pics of Emma Stone in lingerie for "Cabaret". (Drunken Stepfather)

Say what you want about Lance Armstrong, his girlfriend Anna Hansen is hot. (TMZ)

Selena Gomez is cleavtastic in a blue dress going to the Jimmy Kimmel show. (Hollywood Tuna)

Georgia Fowler in a bikini is just what you need today. (Popoholic)

Britney Spears looks 2002 amazing in a crop top shirt. (The Superficial)

Courtney Stodden, her boobs, and her dogs went out on the town. (Dlisted)

Kerry Washington shows off now makeup and big cleav for Allure Magazine. (Huffington Post)

Ariana Grande Leg Show In A Short Skirt in Paris

Pop princess Ariana Grande showed off those famous legs in a very short skirt in Paris. One of the things I like most about Ariana is her penchant for only wearing skirts that go to the tops of her thighs. She can get away with it because she's got a truly magnificent pair of legs. Oh, that one could have those legs wrapped around one's waist. Ariana is also sporting a pair of thigh high stockings which make me crazy. Maybe it's because the whole thigh high stocking thing was very "in" when I was in high school and all the girls I liked but couldn't get wore them, but that look makes me very happy in my pants. She's also got on a headband with cat ears which normally wouldn't do anything for me but for some reason on Ariana it just looks sexy as F.

The great thing is that Ariana is very young so she's just starting out with the hottness. I look forward to many more years of ogling Ariana's legs.

Rachael Finch Nipple Pokes For Speedo Shoot In Sydney

Sexy Aussie Rachael Finch was looking hot as hell even as she appeared to be cold during a photo shoot for Speedo in Sydney. Rachael was wearing a tight little number that showed off her tight bare mid-riff. The top was very form fitting and the outline of Rachael's nips can clearly be seen. I do so love a good nipple poke, don't you? It's hard to hide your nips when they are on the ends of such massive funbags. They just occupy more space than normal. It's basic boobie physics. She was also wearing a pair of teeny tiny short shorts that displayed her amazing long legs for our viewing pleasure. She's pretty tall so there is a lot of sexy leggage to go around.

Rachael is seriously hot. She looks like the kind of girl that would make you work for it but it would be all the sweeter when you got your prize.

 

Feel The Pain Of Taco Bell’s Sriracha Menu

I like sriracha. It's friggin' delicious and I like to put it on everything. The spicy Thai rooster sauce is extremely trendy right now and can be found pretty much everywhere that hipsters dwell. This is unfortunate because it really is an amazing hot sauce. Always with their finger on the pulse of America's gluttonous appetites, the folks at Taco Bell have come out with a sriracha inspired menu. The Sriracha Beefarito, breakfast Sriracha Scramble, and Sriracha Quesadilla are all on the menu to feed you late at night after a night of heavy drinking. I'm conflicted about this. On the one hand, I do like sriracha and think it would probably make Taco Bell's faux meat taste awesome. But I feel bad for Taco Bell's fire sauce. When I go to the Bell it is this lovely red concoction that I am most craving. It almost feels like they are cheating on the fire sauce with sriracha.

Also, not to be gross, but I imagine that this seems like a better idea the night before than it does the next day. The flaming diarrhea will be epic and will leave you unable to sit for a week. I will try these delectable treats and report back. Wish me luck.

Cameron Diaz Hot In Marie Claire And Other Fine Things To Ogle

Cameron Diaz is all kinds of busty in Marie Claire Magazine. (Popoholic)

But let me tell you about Amber Rose's considerable booty. (Huffington Post)

Cameron Russell is sexy as F in this spread for Vogue Mexico. (Drunken Stepfather)

Thank Gawd for Joanna Krupa's funbags in these tiny swimsuits. (Hollywood Tuna)

Britney Spears looks sweaty and sexy coming from the gym. (The Superficial)

Do you want to see video of girls trying out for the LA King's Ice Girls? (COED)

MMA fighter Veronica Macedo is hot...but DO NOT mess with her. (Busted Coverage)

Paris Hilton Leggy In Black Stockings While Shopping In LA

Hall of Fame hottie Paris Hilton was spotted looking leggy as F while on a shopping trip in LA. Paris and her little fuzzball dog were seen strutting around the shopping centers of Los Angeles in a very sexy pair of black stockings, (Paris not the dog). Say what you want about Paris Hilton, she's got some dynamite legs. They are probably her best feature, I would say. They are long and lean and oh so satisfying. Luckily she also almost always has them prominently displayed. I've been a fan of Paris Hilton's legs for over fifteen years. I can remember writing about how hot they were in my dream journal back in college. Yes, I had a dream journal in college but it was only about girls that I thought were really hot but I stood no chance of ever talking to. That and unicorns.

I've always envied the life of Paris Hilton's dogs. I bet they get fed really well and they get to be carried around next to her boobies all day and see her change her clothes. Oh, to be one day reincarnated as the pocket dog of a hot rich woman.