Goddamn. This one’s flip-flopped from a simple ‘who’s the most porntastic’ contest to a serial drama with more mystifying twists than The Da Vinci Code.
Let’s recap… again. Last August, PornHub declared that PS3 was the porn-ogler’s console of choice. Assuming that, y’know, they’re PornHub and probably know their shit in these matters, we believed them. But as it turns out, even the almighty Hub of Porn itself isn’t infallible when it comes to knowing the world’s porn habits. Our whole world views were shaken. If you can’t trust PornHub, who the hell can you trust?
Last week, the Hub (like the Hut, but with less pizza and more anal) hit us with both barrels of updated stat-tacular. They reported that traffic to the site via PlayStation had gone way down, while Xbox –and even freaking Wii– traffic had increased by around 70%. This was controversial. After all, the crown of Perviest, Hardcore-S&M-Viewingest Console is a coveted one. We don’t know if we’re coming or going (pun intended), so who’s on top (also intended)?
To complicate matters further, SugarDVD, the Netflix of porn, now says the exact freaking opposite. Their own spangly infographic (check it out on Destructoid) reports that PS4 users watched 2.6 times more porn than Xbox One users last year. Is this between the consoles, or is it between the porn purveyors themselves? We may never know the answer. But one thing’s for certain: judging by the top five categories searched on PS4, if you’re looking to ogle some amateur (1) big-butted (2) asian (3) college girls’ (4) feet (5), Sony have you covered.
Here’s hoping they work that into their next commercial. Surefire system seller, right there.