Bill SwiftWebsite

Serving as the editor-in-chief of Egotastic! since his release behind a women's prison, Bill Swift has managed to overcome a lack of formal education, or professional skills of any kind, to build a small-sized big empire of online entertainment focused on all things men love -- hot women and a bunch of other guy things when taking momentary breaks from thinking about hot women.

Zhang Yuqi Cleavetastic at Cannes for Global Boobtastic Awareness

By Bill Swift | May 22, 2013 @ 12:15 pm
Zhang Yuqi Cleavage View at 'The Great Gatsby' Cannes Premiere
Zhang Yuqi Cleavage View at 'The Great Gatsby' Cannes Premiere
Zhang Yuqi Cleavage View at 'The Great Gatsby' Cannes Premiere
Zhang Yuqi Cleavage View at 'The Great Gatsby' Cannes Premiere
Zhang Yuqi Cleavage View at 'The Great Gatsby' Cannes Premiere
Zhang Yuqi Cleavage View at 'The Great Gatsby' Cannes Premiere
Zhang Yuqi Cleavage View at 'The Great Gatsby' Cannes Premiere
Zhang Yuqi Cleavage View at 'The Great Gatsby' Cannes Premiere
Zhang Yuqi Cleavage View at 'The Great Gatsby' Cannes Premiere
View the Gallery / 9 Photos »

The Cannes Film Festival is about many things. Okay, well, mostly lots of highfalutin movies you and I will never care to see even on a really slow entertainment day. But also hot women showing off their finest.

And not just Western actresses and models either. The ladies of the Far East and Asian film industry come out to Cannes, including Zhang Yuqi, a Hong Kong based actress who lit up the red carpet for The Great Gatsby with an epically oriental view of her Eastern guns. Quite a sight indeed.

And a faptastic reminder that hotness resides in every single corner of this globe, you just have to go looking for it. Or wait til it finds you. Or do a combination of both. Or just come here everyday, that would be the easiest. Enjoy.

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Petra Nemcova Lingerie Pictures Are See-Through Wild and Wooly Hot

By Bill Swift | May 22, 2013 @ 11:52 am
Petra Nemcova See-Through Goodies for 'Wild Orchid' Lingerie Shoot
Petra Nemcova See-Through Goodies for 'Wild Orchid' Lingerie Shoot
Petra Nemcova See-Through Goodies for 'Wild Orchid' Lingerie Shoot
Petra Nemcova See-Through Goodies for 'Wild Orchid' Lingerie Shoot
Petra Nemcova See-Through Goodies for 'Wild Orchid' Lingerie Shoot
Petra Nemcova See-Through Goodies for 'Wild Orchid' Lingerie Shoot
Petra Nemcova See-Through Goodies for 'Wild Orchid' Lingerie Shoot
Petra Nemcova See-Through Goodies for 'Wild Orchid' Lingerie Shoot
Petra Nemcova See-Through Goodies for 'Wild Orchid' Lingerie Shoot
View the Gallery / 11 Photos »

Former Sports Illustrated Swimsuit model and Dancing with the Stars contestant Petra Nemcova has gone and done it this time. Topping her own history of hotness with this rather epic 'Wild Orchids' lingerie shoot where the Czech model appears in various tropically see-through little bits of fashion lust.

I'm not sure I've ever appreciated underthings quite this much before. It really is the woman who makes the panties. Not the other way around. Throw in some leopard skin themes and I am already online and ready to add to my shopping cart. A cart filled entirely with Petra perfection. Enjoy.

PETRA NEMCOVA HAS BEEN KNOWN TO BRING OUT THE SIDEBOOB
9 Photos »
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Michelle Heaton Bikini Pictures For a Perfect Miami Recovery

By Bill Swift | May 22, 2013 @ 11:20 am
Michelle Heaton in a Striped Bikini in Miami
Michelle Heaton in a Striped Bikini in Miami
Michelle Heaton in a Striped Bikini in Miami
Michelle Heaton in a Striped Bikini in Miami
Michelle Heaton in a Striped Bikini in Miami
Michelle Heaton in a Striped Bikini in Miami
Michelle Heaton in a Striped Bikini in Miami
Michelle Heaton in a Striped Bikini in Miami
Michelle Heaton in a Striped Bikini in Miami
View the Gallery / 12 Photos »

With all the buzz around Angelina Jolie and her big double mastectomy announcement, you might think she was the first person, at least celebrity, to ever go through such a circumstance. But, nay, there have been others, including British former pop group singer turned TV show hostess Michelle Heaton who just last December went through a similar procedure when they discovered she had the same mutated gene and family history as Jolie.

Michelle has been in Miami filming a reality show where she gets chunky people in shape for some big event. And she's been in her bikini 24x7. Perhaps our first good glimpse at what is likely to be a more common visual of the future. Good on you, Michelle. Keep a stiff upper lip and the tiny bikinis coming. Enjoy.

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Demi Moore Bikini Pictures Continue to Shine at 49, Err, 50

By Bill Swift | May 22, 2013 @ 10:42 am
Demi Moore Soaks up the Malibu Sun in a Bikini Top
Demi Moore Soaks up the Malibu Sun in a Bikini Top
Demi Moore Soaks up the Malibu Sun in a Bikini Top
Demi Moore Soaks up the Malibu Sun in a Bikini Top
Demi Moore Soaks up the Malibu Sun in a Bikini Top
Demi Moore Soaks up the Malibu Sun in a Bikini Top
Demi Moore Soaks up the Malibu Sun in a Bikini Top
Demi Moore Soaks up the Malibu Sun in a Bikini Top
Demi Moore Soaks up the Malibu Sun in a Bikini Top
View the Gallery / 10 Photos »

Hard to imagine the sweet barely legal teen girl with big bush we knew so well from late 70's Euro mags is now all of 50. A few times divorced and addicted to Whip-Its is no match for the blessed genetics Demi Moore inherited which allows her to still look rather amazing at the mid-century mark on a balcony in her bikini in Malibu.

Of course, Demi also puts in some serious workout time to aid her God-given gifts. She's even making up with her semi-estranged daughter through daily joint yoga workouts. I'm angry at Demi but I doubt she'll let me get sweaty with her in stretch pants. Still, you know I love the veteran hotties, and ogling Demi in her bikini comes at the right price of free, and without having to workout at all. Enjoy.

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Humpday Huzzah! Jodie Gasson Topless Goodness Bare and Bodacious in Black

 
By Bill Swift | May 22, 2013 @ 9:51 am
Click to See Uncensored
 Jodie Gasson Sexy in Black for Topless Shoot
View 23 All-Stars Photos »

Can it be the middle of the week already. It seems like I just got behind my computer with a Valu-Pak of Enternmann's mini-donuts and a half-tanked bottle of Jim Beam on Monday morning. How time flies when you're looking at some killer bodies. Though, none bodies perhaps more curvaceously ripe than Jodie Gasson, who I turn to in times of trouble, times of need, or just any time I can get the bathroom to myself for five minutes.

I feel like a photo of Jodie Gasson could be used in the dictionary in the place of the much longer written definition of 'woman'. It's what I'd use to explain to an alien genderless race visiting our planet what consumes the thoughts of men on this planet. And when Jodie gets to her teasy stripping to reveal her boobtastic wonderments, well, I'm guessing even the aliens would sprout their first wood. The sextastic is truly universal. Huzzah!

(Check out much more Jodie Gasson skin-filled goodness at JodieGasson.com)

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Fernanda Marin Loses Her Bikini Top for Almost Peek-a-Boo Greatness

By Bill Swift | May 22, 2013 @ 8:58 am
Fernanda Marin Bikini Top Falls off on the Beach in Malibu
Fernanda Marin Bikini Top Falls off on the Beach in Malibu
Fernanda Marin Bikini Top Falls off on the Beach in Malibu
Fernanda Marin Bikini Top Falls off on the Beach in Malibu
Fernanda Marin Bikini Top Falls off on the Beach in Malibu
Fernanda Marin Bikini Top Falls off on the Beach in Malibu
Fernanda Marin Bikini Top Falls off on the Beach in Malibu
Fernanda Marin Bikini Top Falls off on the Beach in Malibu
Fernanda Marin Bikini Top Falls off on the Beach in Malibu
View the Gallery / 14 Photos »

Fernanda Marin is a super faptastic looking Brazilian model and TV show hostess trying to cut it up north here in Yankee town, and by the looks of her photoshoot in Malibu and somewhat staged, but still quite awesome bikini top loss, I'd say she's making great headway, err, bodyway.

As a general ambassador of hotness to the world, I would like to extend an invitation to all sextastic women from 200 or however many nations we have now in the world to come to America in bikinis and lose your tops in our waters. I'll bring the wine and crudite platter. Enjoy.

Check Out Fernanda Marin In Her English Language Demo Reel »

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Candice Swanepoel In Black Leather With a Bullwhip? Oh, Yes, Please.

By Bill Swift | May 22, 2013 @ 8:11 am
Candice Swanepoel Sizzles in Vogue Australia June 2013
Candice Swanepoel Sizzles in Vogue Australia June 2013
Candice Swanepoel Sizzles in Vogue Australia June 2013
Candice Swanepoel Sizzles in Vogue Australia June 2013
Candice Swanepoel Sizzles in Vogue Australia June 2013
Candice Swanepoel Sizzles in Vogue Australia June 2013
Candice Swanepoel Sizzles in Vogue Australia June 2013
Candice Swanepoel Sizzles in Vogue Australia June 2013
Candice Swanepoel Sizzles in Vogue Australia June 2013
View the Gallery / 17 Photos »

I'll say this. Not many things in life live up to their hype. And when I heard that the uber-delicious Candice Swanepoel was in Vogue Australia dressed in dominatrix black leather toting a bullwhip, well, I was certain it sounded to good to be true. But, yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Clause, and he's apparently a very deviant jolly old man. Wow. I mean, wow.

It's hard to calculate the precise number of Swanepoel fantasies sparked by the sight of the super sextastic South African looking more than in charge, but I'm going to guestimate the number at around infinity. Enjoy.

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