Bill SwiftWebsite

Serving as the editor-in-chief of Egotastic! since his release behind a women's prison, Bill Swift has managed to overcome a lack of formal education, or professional skills of any kind, to build a small-sized big empire of online entertainment focused on all things men love -- hot women and a bunch of other guy things when taking momentary breaks from thinking about hot women.

Reese Witherspoon Heavenly White Hot Owning the Wild Red Carpet

Okay, we saw Kimberly Cole on this same red carpet for the movie Wild earlier, but let's be honest, Reese Witherspoon is the star of this movie and the girl I dream about nekkid fishing with nightly. She absolutely owned the paparazzi at her own star turning film premiere, as she should, and she did. Reese gets ridiculed at times for her occasionally drunkenly silly outbursts at the po-po, as if the rest of us are somehow immune to acting stupid while under the influence of too many beverages. Reese is by all accounts, just one fine minxy bosomy MILF making her way in the rough streets of Brentwood.

And when Reese gets all decked out for galas and red carpet, man, look out. She is a true knockout. I believe they call this movie star beauty. I just call it, oh, please, may I have a small taste, just a sliver. It's never polite to insist on a big piece of pie. My grandma taught me that. She was a crude lady. Enjoy.

India Reynolds Topless Showdown With Sisterly Brunette Holly Peers

 

There's really no reason to take two perfectly friendly glamorous girls with ridiculously hot bodies and force them into brutally honest chestal competition. Okay one reason. It's really fun. The notion that you could have one of these set tremendous peaches perched over your drooling maw, let alone two battling it out for the right to perch. Wow, that's like doubling down on the dream. I admire the ambition.

This week's Battle of the Boobtastic features two of my all-time favorite all-stars, India Reynolds and her cheeky sweetness taking on Holly Peers, a woman for whom I'd root for the Raiders if she told me it made her hot. That's a big give. She's a big hot girl. For your part, it is the role to decide the winner, and, ergo, the not winner. In your opinion, between these two super fine vixens, whose ta-ta's reign supreme?

Battle of the Boobtastic: India Reynolds vs. Holly Peers

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Kimberly Cole Braless Lacy Flashes for the Premiere of Wild

Wild is the epic journey of Reese Witherspoon into nature to recover from a personal tragedy and rediscover her own humanity. Okay, unless Reese has to disrobe to save herself from a feral bear, I'm not going to see this. It sounds too deep for my cursory level understanding of the human condition. Conditions brought on by the likes of MTV hostess and pop singer Kimberly Cole strutting the red carpet of the Wild movie premiere without any bra.

You may have noticed a definite trend in Hollywood fashion of late that is very anti-bra. Or, what you might call, very pro-Egotastic! I'm not sure which fashion maven has convinced so many hot women in the business to show off upstairs commando, but I want to give them a big wet kiss. Or maybe just a box of See's Candies to be safe. Kimberly Cole looked mighty fine in her own backless and braless lacy gown. I do so highly endorse this look. Not to mention the up to one saved in trying to unclasp a brassiere should be so ever fortunate and dexterously impaired as I. Enjoy.

Michea Crawford Strikes Out Alluringly, Sparing Us No Sextastic (Get It? Bowling Time!)

Okay, look, my job is easy, but not that easy. I do occasionally need to make horrible puns and I do often need to stare at beautiful half-nekkid women all day long. Okay, it's pretty easy. But when I see the likes of Michea Crawford modeling lingerie in a bowling alley, don't think I don't get the itch to bolt out of this office and grab my 16-pound blue betty and hit the lanes. At least, I think that's what that itch indicates. I should probably see a doctor.

Michea Crawford and her brunette lusciousness took to the turkey shoot for another day of pimping the Bestform lingerie line. If Bestform refers to the ridiculously hot body of Michea, I'd call it very aptly name. Your results may vary, as they say in many disclaimers. The very thought of bowling with a sextastic hot model in lingerie is actually now making me weak in the knees. I'm going to need more rosin! Enjoy.

Hells Bells! Phoebe Price Nearly Spills Out of Her Top

I must say, every woman looks remarkably better when in an AC/DC shirt. Something hot about rocker chicks, even if only half-committed I suppose, so long as the other half if committed to super low cut tops and big cut bosoms. Like Phoebe Price. That no longer so rare specimen of celebrity in Hollywood looking to get noticed for her bodily features. Well, I'd be lying if I didn't admit to noticing.

Phoebe often walks her dog down the streets of Beverly Hills in semi to very revealing outfits. I'd say it doesn't work, but it does. If the paps won't come to you, you come to the paps. Something elegant like that. And when you're about to spill out of your top with your fun sized funbags, well, people are going to take pictures. And oglers are going to do their thing as well. We all have our part to play in the circle of prurient life. Enjoy.

Lucy Collett Topless Pictures of Stripety Bodysuit Revelation, Like the Juiciest Fruit of All

 

Ginger topped glamour model Lucy Collett and I have had an ongoing affair of the heart for several years now. Naturally, she's not quite as aware of this affair as I am, devoting many many hours to our relationship while Lucy mostly pretends to not know I exist or acknowledge my correspondence. I just assume this is how relationships mostly work.

But as long as our mutual or one-sided lust has lingered, every time I see Lucy in another sextastic boobtastic revealing pictorial, I fall into moist desire all over again. And, yes, for the record Moist Desire was the name of my band in high school. She's just a curvaceous smiling faptastic wonder of bosomy perfect proportions. I want Lucy to pop out of every cake ever made. Even the little tiny ones at the grocery store. That would be something. Bless you once more, Lucy Collett. You have a higher calling. Enjoy.

(Be sure to visit Lucy's Official Fanpage for all your ginger topped hottie needs.)

Ireland Baldwin Camel Toe, Christina Milian Nipple Pokes, Bella Thorne Bikini Highlight the Sextastic Twitpic Roundup

Every week I try to bring to you thirty or so of my favorite social media pictures of the week, published by the sextastic celebrities themselves. Every week I think to myself, man, what if they all suddenly get real jobs or hobbies and stop taking photos of themselves half-nekkid? This is the kind of fear I live with so you don't have to. I'm kind of a celebrity skin martyr. Fortunately, my bikini is half empty mentality has never come to pass. The bikinis are definitely more than half full this week, along with the poetic bodily passion inducements of some of the more prodigious personal photo posters in all of Tinsel Town.

This week's Sextastic Twitpic Roundup includes Ireland Baldwin in some snug little bikini bottoms, Bella Thorne showing off her own bikini form, Miranda Kerr ever super hot bodied, Christina Milian poking and proud, Katy Perry bikini and cleavy looks, Nicki Minaj flashing lingerie clad curves, and much much more. You owe it to those who won't be coming home from Walmart on Black Friday to check out each and every one of these sweet sextastic self-candids and turn that frown upside down. Enjoy