Ashley Smith Don’t Mind the Gap

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Lex Jurgen - January 31, 2017

Everybody's an SI swimsuit model these days. It's like declaring yourself an actor in Los Angeles. There are ten thousand. Ninety-nine hundred are struggling with rent. Everybody's looking for a hook. For Ashley Smith it's been her massive front tooth gap. It's as if her parents couldn't afford orthodonture. Only she's a hot American chick, so you have to wonder if the double-Letterman was some kind of intentional.

Working in Smith's favor is the fact that nobody gives a shit about your teeth when you're half naked in lingerie. That explains how Britain keeps self-populating. There is no such thing as Butter Teeth in England. Men will put up with so much pain of so many varieties to get into a good looking woman's pants, nobody's letting a little diastema stop them. Swallow? Fuck no, spit. Through that gap. Wait, I'm going to film this. It's like the Bellagio.

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