All Stars

Sara Malakul Lane Topless Nekkid Jailbait


Sometimes, life does work out for the dreamers. Like myself, dreaming about Thai Eurasian hottie Sara Malakul Lane so much lately, only to be rewarded by a bunch of you who sent in must-see screencaps from Sara's recent skinematic bits of excellence in the movie Jailbait this year. If the movie title alone doesn't hook you, then these super revealing shots of my new found lust certainly will. I wouldn't yet call her a Sylvia Kristel for the modern era, but I suppose I might be getting close.

Sara, I'm open to running lines with you for any of your upcoming projects. I usually get pretty deep into character when helping hot actresses rehearse, but have no fear,  I come equipped with costume for strict principal, evil prison guard, and harassing deviant boss, along with the necessary accessories and tools. This is an entirely complementary service on my part. All I ask in return is your willingness not to name names in your memoirs when it comes time to expose the worst of Hollywood. Let's do this. Enjoy.

Rachel Korine and Funbags a Plenty in the Boob Tube Roundup (VIDEO)


Just because the major shows might be off a week doesn't mean the world of tubes on television ceases to exist. Oh, no, sir-ee. Or is that Siri? The point is, the Boob Tube Roundup exists so long as crazy hot thespianics are removing their tops for the purposes of dramatic interpretation on the small screen. Some of the bigger ta-ta shows don't roll around until January, but for this Fall classic, we have some delightful chest puppies to leer.

This week's Roundup includes Rachel Korine actively making the sexy and flashing her udders on The Knick, Michelle Batista super hottie and topless in HBO Brazil's O Negocio, Ruth Wilson in flashback form in the second episode of The Affair, and Faye Marsay briefly flashing her Funions and showing off in an Internet sex tape in Glue. It's all there for you, happy grabby ogling gentleman. You must merely press the play button of your life. Enjoy.

Adrianne Curry Topless Artistic Treasures on Nekkid Type Display in Kendal Carson Photoshoot


I'm the first guy to admit I don't get themes and motifs and anything artistic above the finger painting level. I really was a finger painting master up through the second grade when they found a color matching the paint on my index finger smudged on a sensitive area of a female classmates body. In my defense, she was the best looking girl in second grade and she completely understood my need for Picasso like explorations of line and space. However stupendously slow my artistic sensibilities are conversely how inexorably drawn I am to topless mostly nekkid hotties like exercise and cosplay queenie Adrianne Curry who got quite unclothed and bare boobtastic for a variety of noteworthy looks in a preview of this Kendal Carson photoshoot.

It's certainly unique. You mix in all these heavily crafted looks with the taut toned and tight body of Adrianne Curry and her faptastic yams and you have something that reminds me of  both classical Greek sculpture and a show I had to keep putting in quarters to keep operating the last time I was in New York. What a glorious female form. Consider me artistically inspired once again. I'm going to need a lot of finger paint. Enjoy.

Camille Rowe Topless From Angels By Russell James


The lovely Camille Rowe took some sexy topless pics by Russell James for his Angels photo book. They are in black and white, so you know they are all tasteful and stuff. Camille is pretty seriously hot. Like, more than your usual naked model type person. She looks like no one you see in everyday life unless you are one of the lucky bastards that gets to hang out with models all the time. Her boobies are superlative. You can tell because one of the pics is an extreme closeup of her nipple. It's one of those slightly upturned pixie nips that look playful yet down for business. She's also got an incredibly pert and tight bottom. I'd like to smack that butt, however that is how you get put in jail. So, I will have to settle for giving it a sexy slap in my mind. Alas.

I like black and white nudes. It makes me feel like I'm less of just a horndog ogling chicks and more like I'm appreciating art or something.

READER FINDS: Maria Conchita Alonso Nekkid, AnnaLynne McCord Topless, Ali Larter Crazy Hot, and Much Much More…


I wait for Fridays like parents of teenagers wait for them to check in when out with their cool friends at high school parties. Sometimes, I think Friday will never come, but then it does, and I thank the Good Lord and lie to myself that my child is the only one at the party not drinking or having unprotected sex. It puts a smile on my face always when I get the opportunity to open up the reader email bag and smell the fresh scent of vanilla mixed with hot celebrity flesh. That's an aroma I really should bottle and sell at car washes.

This week's Reader Finds includes previously unbeknownst to us bodacious model Carlotta Champagne (we can't confirm that as her given Christian name, but we do still thank EgoReader 'Jonathan' for his pledge), Maria Conchita Alonso buck as in nekkid in her early film work (many kudos to 'Stanner'), busty Mindy Robinson topless in Alpha House (lovely funions provided by 'Derek'), Natasha Henstridge topless in her own thespianic turn (lovely lusties via 'Bella'), British racktastic hottie Roxanne Pallett quite topless (the most pleasant of melons provided by 'Patrick'), Hailey Clauson model wunderkind topless in shots (oh, me oh my oh's brought to you by 'Allan F.') AnnaLynne McCord topless in one of her genius cinematic fares (McCord mams donated by 'Classy'), Rose McGowan topless in the tub (always been a funbag faptastic, proven by 'David R.'), Madeleine Stowe classically big screen topless (lovely lovelier and loveliests bequeathed by 'Earl'), Astrid Berges-Frisbey and her Spanish tetas putting on an act (blessed Iberians via 'Stu'), Clemence Poesy getting racy on TV (love me some Clemence, thanks 'Donn'), Kate Winslet and Rachel Griffith topless in the 90's (for your pre-millennium lust crushing, kudos 'Ellen W.'), Brazilian model Gracie Hans long and lean and lovely and topless (surprised pleasantly by 'David M.'), Amanda Peet topless in her bestest topless moment ever (digs me some Peet peaches, thanks 'Owen'), Ali Larter crazy sextastic from Allure (Ali and I go way back, she just doesn't know it, much obliged 'Terence'), Karlie Kloss a tad bit slender but quite topless in black and white (lean reveals courtesy of 'Franks'), Emily Ratajkowski busty behind the scenes of her new Cosmo shoot (Emily can do no wrong, shown by 'Dell'), and last, but not least, Beach Bunny modeling Yara Khmidan showing you how the girls of Europe like to flash their bikinis. It's almost too much, but I could never give you enough. Or vice versa. Enjoy.

Melissa Martinez Topless Photoshoot in Interviú Magazine


The sultry Melissa Martinez showed off her hot Latin chichis in a topless photoshoot for Interviu magazine. I was trying to think up an adjective to explain the awesomeness of Melissa's funbags and the only thing I can come up with is sublime. Her boobies are perfection personified. They are the kind of ta-tas you just want to curl up to and go to sleep. She should really make a concerted effort to never wear a shirt ever again. She needs to be like those Amazonian natives that always have their jubblies out like you might see on a National Geographic special. As if that weren't enough, she's also got herself an incredibly tight and curvy booty. This is a great thing to wake up to, my friends.

I plan on looking at these pictures throughout the day as a kind of pick-me-up. Think of Melissa's boobs as a Five Hour Energy but, you know, boobs.

Arabella Durkin Topless Delights for Delicious End of Day Thoughts


If you're name is Arabella, there's a good chance you're going to be pretty hot. Or a Disney princess. Or both. Arabella Durkin has some regal beagles you will definitely want to peruse in her new pictorial for Zoo magazine. She is as they say, a curvy gal.

I'm not going to lie to you, I could fall in love with any blonde woman with smoky eyes after about 8pm. If that girls happens to be smoking hot with the teats of a goddess, that applies all day long. Arabella is the kind of girl I might even post a missed connections listing on Craigslist for. You were the hot girl with the bodacious topless rack. I was the guy wearing nothing but a table cloth and drooling as I cried out your name. Let's meet! Enjoy.