All Stars

Leah Francis Topless Striptease for Bedroom Titillations (And a Few Heart Palpitations)

 

There is perhaps no greater gift or curse than the male private parts. At times, I look skyward and lament to the heavens about all the poor choices and errant decision making in the name of the bobos. It's usually about the time I'm wondering why I'm being billed for the Oprah channel on cable. Then there are times when that blessed little (err, big) gift from Mother Nature just finds its happy place. As in the leering of Leah Francis stripping out of her clothes and revealing her perfect peaches for the love of all things lusty. Today, I am glad to be a man. I am most days, except those rare occasions when my really attractive lesbian friend has a couple drinks and tells me she wishes I were a woman. On those days... well, I can't help but imagine.

Leah Francis always makes me feel special. Like she's removing her unnecessary wardrobe just for me. Such is the power of the sextastic lady with skills of both the bodily and psychiatric variety. She moves me form and soul. Bless you, Leah, for all the goodness you bring this world without ever asking for a thing other than our full and undivided attention. Enjoy.

Svea Berlie Topless Dutch Treat With Ginger Teats of Honey

 

Now, I don't for a second believe that Dutch model hottie Svea Berlie is a natural ginger. But the power of my mind to believe what it wants to believe is truly unparalleled in the realm of self-deception. So for today Svea is my ginger crush, all goofily made up, but undeniably hot and topless and flashing her pretty perfect puppies in this teasy Andrew Kuykendall photoshoot.

It's a truly wonderful thing that European models know, expect, and even encourage the topless style pictorials. I have to respect a value system that values fine female forms enough to show them off to an admiring public. I wish we could develop similar philosophies more domestically here where we still treat delicious mammaries as Satan's handiwork. Someday perhaps. I'll keep trying on my end. In the mean time, revel in the leering meal time that is the sextastic and topless body of Svea Berlie, a true Dutch treat. Enjoy.

Asian Hottie Aynur Goes Nekkid in the Woods for Hair Flinging Mammarial Monday

 

I'm going East Coast for my Mammarial Monday. I mean, East Coast of the Asian continent and glamour model Aynur. When you only have one name, you'd better earn it. And Aynur does just that with a sextastic frolic through the hundred acre woods of my fantasy mind where honey of a different sort is what I'm after. Much like our sextastic finds from the Orient of yester-weeks, Aynur exhibits a curvaceous bodacious Asian hottie form that just about sends me into the catatonic state of bliss that often find me buried alive by mistake many a weekend. I really do need to hold up a flag or sign or something.

On Mondays we like to kick off the boobtastic week with some precious puppies and seriously hot skin that let's us know it's okay to lust once again. Be troubled not your tender libido. Girls like Aynur are hear with their milky cookies. Enjoy.

Nina Dobrev and Kaley Cuoco In Bikinis Surprising Highlight to the Boob Tube Roundup (VIDEO)

 

Normally, we do tend to restrict the hallowed ground of the Boob Tube Roundup to those small screen thespianics who dare to bare their dramatically trained funbags for all the world to see. But this week in particular there happened to be three rather noteworthy bikini hotttie reveals on non-nude network television (boring) that deserves some leering attention.

Nina Dobrev and her wicked hot bikini body in Vampire Diaries, Kaley Cuoco in a brief bikini top moment in Big Bang Theory, and Elena Satine who we fell in love with on Magic City now flashing busty bikini hotness on Revenge. Oh, if only these shows made for adults were not so frightened to reveal like adults, we could've had something even more epic. Though I assure you this trio in two pieces will still amazing. Joining them from our topless cable side is Charlotte Spencer in the British series Glue and Evelien Bosmans in the Euro show Amateurs, this week, because we still need a little sweet boobage in the boob tube roundup. Enjoy.

Jodie Gasson Curvaceous Topless Tasty Front Porch

 

Do I have a thing for lusty busty blondes with natural curvy goodness? I do indeed. I'm a man who stands up for what he believes in, provided I won't be punched or kicked or have the kids all put Scotch tape in my hair. Oh, second grade, you were rough. Today I'm standing up, as soon as I can without suffering embarrassment, for my hottie delight Jodie Gasson. Jodie's name alone makes me smile. Jodie's body makes me smile all over.

Featured in this lovely pictorial in front of the wooden cabin a la the one where Jodie I would likely spend the winter together with nothing but the grinding of our stranger danger parts to keep us warm, Jodie shows why an hourglass figured woman in a slinky dress that soon comes off is just about the most sextastic bit of visual wonderment ever. So simple and yet so hard. I mean her striptease, not... never mind. Job well done, Jodie. Let's go to Disneyland and get thrown off the Matterhorn for lewd conduct. It's my dream to someday have that happen when I'm actually with somebody else. Enjoy.

Thank God It’s Funbags! Emma Frain Topless Super Hotness for Summer Beach Time Mammaries

 

Summer isn't over until we decide it is. And with visions of the outstandingly sextastic Emma Frain stripping out of her bikini top on the beach, you can bet that the sun will decide to stick around the equator for just a little while long for it too can ogle the sweet female form of this British beach delight. I could spend all day just staring at the amazing rack and tempting allure of Ms. Frain. In fact, there's a good chance I shall. Even as we pop the Two Buck Chuck here in the Egotastic! offices for celebrate a Friday afternoon, I do believe I'm going to keep on staring.

On Fridays, we like to launch our faithful readers into the weekend with a smile on their face and an unseemly bulge in their trousers. That goes for you too Sapphic leaning ladies, come on, blow it out the next 48 hours. You deserve a good bit of R&R. Take with your sweet thoughts of beautiful women, world class hot bodies, and the contentment that comes therein. Thank God It's Funbags!

Naomi Watts, Maggie Gyllenhaal, and Emmanuelle Seigner All Topless in the Mr. Skin Minute (VIDEO)

 

It's that time again. Time to get your movie, DVD, and Blu-Ray forecast for skincasts from our good friends in the Windy City at Mr. Skin. They keep their nose to the grindstone specifically looking out for the single hottest flesh reveals on recorded media so that you might save your valuable time just for watching. They're like saints, who love boobs.

This week's Mr. Skin Minute includes the delightfully blonde hottie Naomi Watts not nekkid in her current Birdman flick, but quite topless in Mulholland Falls, Maggie Gyllenhaal flashing lingerie ta-ta's for The Honourable Woman TV series now on DVD, and Emmanuelle Seigner topless in Roman Polanski's Venus in Fur now out on DVD. So many ta-ta's, so much time. Take your time to enjoy.

And, why not double down, nay, triple down on your happiness factor with an Ego discounted membership to Mr. Skin. It's jaunty, lightweight, and will immediately stop your chaffing issues. Strike that, the chaffing might get worse for a while. But it's hundreds of thousands of photos and videos of good times.