bill-swift - May 22, 2014
Real Housewives Of Orange County star Alexis Bellino took time out of fighting and wine throwing to look super hot on the beach. Alexis looked sexy as F in a purple bikini that barely supported her firm funbags. The girls are seriously busting out of every seam. There is quite a bit of sideboob action on the sides and you think, "Man, that is some killer boobage," but then you look at the front. It's like the cleavage fairy came in the night and brought you all the cleav your eyeballs can stand to look at. I don't know about you, but a killer boob valley like this stops me dead. I can barely think straight when I see a plunging neckline. Basically, I turn into a drooling moron, (even more than I normally am). The bikini's bottom also shows off Alexis' tight booty. It's got just the right amount of curve to tone ratio. That's a mathematical formula I invented that calculates the width x height/crack - ass jiggle =perfect butt.
I've only seen the RHOC a couple of times but I remember thinking that Alexis was by far the hottest housewife. I should really start watching it again if she's going to be wearing stuff like this.