Chloe Moretz Getting all Grow’d Up in Elle, This Is the Start of Something Wonderful

I know. I'm an eternal optimist. I can't help but feel forever positive when my job is to swim in the river of the celebrity sextastic and that river keeps widening and getting ever deeper. Take for example Chloe Moretz. The teen thespianic and major movie darling is finally starting to get a bit risque in her magazine photoshoots, albeit not quite like she might when she reaches the important mile marker next February.

Chloe's beautiful light shines through in her rather cleavetastic bit of wonderment in the new edition of Elle magazine. A number of more progressive actresses and models have started  their exhibitionist campaigns on the pages of this very same magazine. Will Chloe's next photoshoot for this showy fashion magazine be even more revealing? The eternal optimist in me say, it is decidedly so. That might actually be the Magic-8 ball I swallowed on a dare. Chloe, so much goodness lies in your future I couldn't even begin to calculate it with my pinching fingers counting technique. It all kind of starts now. Enjoy.

Nina Agdal So Damn Hot in Bras and Panties (Get Yourself an Ice Bucket)

Danish Delight Nina Agdal may be conquering the world, but she's not forsaking her hottie roots as one of the world's preeminent lingerie models. Thus came forth Nina and so shall she continue to dominate with her stellar body and come hither looks in photoshoots such as this pictorial for Leonisa Lingerie. Red, black, white, yellow, it matters now when little bits of lace and satin are barely covering Nina's funner parts. Oh, to come back in my next life as Nina's personal lingerie collection. I would just need a little tiny mouth to scream.

Nina Agdal has come so far in the past three years, it's almost hard to imagine. But nothing shall ever match the hardness per se of seeing Nina doing what she does best, making a thong and a bra look like absolutely heaven. Nina, may you never wane. Enjoy.

Thank God It’s Funbags: Yayoi Houjou Topless with The Bandage Motif, It’s Okay, She’s More Than Alright

 

You know I understand art and themes and symbolism about as well as the squirrel out on your lawn decided if a bottle cap is a nut or not, so when I see wicked alluring Japanese glamour model Yayoi Houjou nekkid save for some bandages and some makeup of marks on her body, I have zero idea what the heck that is supposed to mean. Rather, like the caveman that once bore me, I lay back and just stare wantonly at her ridiculously passion inducing body, including a much obliging patch of fur not oft-seen in these days of shorn clean lady nests. I for one call this a triumph.

Each Friday we top off the week by celebrating the most moving and transformative works of art in the sextastic collection. Yayoi Houjou may not be a household name in this country, but that's okay, you can just whisper her name softly while you watch her remove her bandages. There is no wrong way to ogle a crazy hot nekkid woman. Thank God It's Funbags!

Miley Cyrus Shows Off Her Brazilian Waxing in Puerto Rico Concert

I'll say this for going to a Miley Cyrus concert, you do get an eyeful. I think it's the earful part that's a problem. But if you can pack enough cotton in those aural canals you might just delight in watching the daring pop star in rather tiny outfits spreading her legs and other body parts to shock and awe the crowd into not caring about the music so much. It's kind of genius really.

As I've maintained, even if you're not a Miley fan, you must give her props for raising the bar on pop star skin baring over the past two years. There is absolutely no doubt that the singers you do love who are running about half-nekkid on stage and in music videos is in part a result of Miley pushing the envelope and making tons of cash. She didn't exactly invent the theory of relativity, she did something much much more important. Enjoy.

Emily Palos Hosed Down Sideboob Hotness in C-Heads

It's not all that hard. Hot blonde L.A. model, a hose, a fan, some skimpy outfits, somebody grab a camera because we're about to make magic. As C-Heads magazine did with fair hottie Emily Palos in a photo shoot where she's both dripping wet and wind blown naughty and all kinds of memorable peeks.

Not having much experience ogling Emily in the past, naturally I am giving her the all over examination with my retinal cones so I can memorize every inch of her oustandingly sextastic body. Like a dog sniffing a new acquaintance, I'm never quite comfortable until I can re-draw every nook and cranny of a woman with charcoal on paper with my eyes closed. I usually need about an hour, depending on how long I linger on the inner thighs. That is my weak spot. Welcome to Egotastic!, Emily. Linger while. We have dip. Enjoy.

Whitney St. John Strips Naked to Report the Naked Entertainment News

 

If I've said it once, I've said it seven times now, you really can't find a better way to spend six bucks a month to get your news naked from hotties than by becoming a member of Naked News. Sure, you can watch Katie Couric with all her clothes on, if that's your thing. Or you can watch the likes of Whitney St. John delivering her entertainment reports whilst stripping out of her confining wardrobe. Everything is better with nekkid hot women involved. I dare you to name something that isn't.

Check out Whitney's Naked News report video and get all your entertainment and celebrity news needs while staring at the hostess' lady nest. It's win win. I'm sure there's a third win in there too if you watch in slow motion. Enjoy.

READER FINDS: Cameron Diaz Topless in Sex Tape, Pamela Anderson Nekkid, Cali Lee Topless and Much Much More…

 

Each week I have the pleasure of dipping into the Reader Finds email bag with my prurient little paw and extracting a week's worth of the best and most boobtastic of the content generated by you, the user, the reader, and all around scholar-athletes yet to be convicted for any type of human crime. It's both a privilege and an honor to be on the receiving end of your rightfully dirty minds, without having to wear any type of protective shield or latex wrapping. It is, since 1911, a little something we like to call Reader Finds.

This week's Reader Finds includes Lucy Collett showing how she does selfies (thank you to EgoReader 'Green'), Ariana Grande booty on an Aussie TV show (kudos out to 'Shannon'), Cali Lee, the adult film actress who messed around with Britney's boyfriend doing some fine movie work (sweet contribution from 'Devon'), Naomi Campbell topless in a Russian periodical (supermodel ta's delivered by 'Elliot'), Asia Argento topless on the silver screen (thank you kindly to 'Maria'), Kate Luyben topless in the vastly underrated Femme Fatales (Skinematics via 'Douglas'), Audrey Tautou topless in her own screen turn (French delights courtesy of 'Mon'), Marion Cotillard most definitely topless (luscious lovelies by way of 'Francia'), Juliana Scalch topless hotness in foreign cinema (windmilled over the fence by 'Len'), Pamela Anderson nekkid at Hugh Hefner's birthday party (the ta's jumped out of the cake thanks to 'Emory'), Rachel Mortenson wicked hot modeling pics (ooh la la's from 'Steven'), Olivia Cooke topless on celluloid (slipped under the door by 'Sweetz'), Juliette Lewis topless in Strange Days (indeedy do's handed over by 'Brad'), Kate Upton and Emily Ratajkowski and SI buddies in bikinis (bathing suit beauties previewed by 'Keller'), Hayden Panettiere in one damn sextastic shoot (H.P's thanks to 'William'), Elisa Dushku sweet in a bikini (underrated hotness via 'Tony'), Cameron Diaz topless moment from Sex Tape (rare nip sighting captured by 'Donnie'), and last, but not at all least, Sharon Stone flashing her bigguns in FI2. It's all good and skintastic. If only you believe. Enjoy.