Sam Robeson - February 19, 2018
At this weekend's BAFTA Awards, celebrities took the Golden Globes approach to fashion by looking super bangable in the most universally flattering color in order to end sex once and for all. Cleavage as far as the eye could see sent a clear message to the world - "We are not your sex objects." A sub-movement that has arrived with Time's Up and #MeToo is the shaming and cyberbullying of women who do not conform to the majority, and as I've said before, if 2018 has taught us anything it's that you should never question the status quo and for God's sake, if you're a woman, you always need to criticize other women on the Internet. Time's Up... on hearing different perspectives and giving others the benefit of the doubt!
This all brings us to the pregnant Kate Middleton, who is already grappling with the fact that she turned into Lisa Marie Presley overnight. Middleton opted for a green dress at the BAFTA Awards versus a black one - a seemingly benign choice that is providing people the perfect opportunity to shame a pregnant woman. Pro tip: If you want to join the Hollywood elite, next time you disagree with a pregnant woman's fashion statement, make sure to punch her in the face and call her a whore.
The Royals have a history of not expressing their political views, and they actually can't even vote. By wearing a green dress Middleton was most likely not advocating sexual harassment, and was instead keeping the political unity needed to bankroll her expensive and precarious perch. Or maybe she just likes green. Or maybe she had a black dress picked out, but it didn't fit her because she's Lisa Marie Presley. The world will never know because at this point Rose McGowan has already eaten Kate's organs. Take that you whore. See I can make it in Hollywood yet.
— Nikki Long (@Nikki_L87) February 18, 2018
I know the Royals aren’t supposed to get involved with “protests” or anything… but would it really have been THAT bad for Kate Middleton to wear black??? #BAFTAs2018
— Rachel McGrath (@RachelMcGrath) February 18, 2018
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