On the days I do get to the gym, I leave looking like a wounded beast in the field the farmers consider shooting to put out of its misery. It’s sort of a look of anguish mixed with flop sweat that surely must scare the local children. I’m sure parents point to me and tell their kids that this monster is coming for them if they don’t clean their rooms and eat their vegetables. But I’m good with that. Somehow, Taylor Swift manages to look perfect leaving her gym. I know she’s actually working out within as evidenced by her toned legs and slender body and all around fit as a fiddle female form. I’m guessing she’s not showering with the regular folk. And she must have some kind of stylist and wardrobe person who accompanies her to her workouts. Or maybe her gym just offers that, Mine no longer even offers hand towels. But I’m guessing she’s not at at Bally’s.
Taylor Swift, I applaud you, your hot long legs, your summer wardrobe, and your effortless appeal. Let people mock your perfect girl persona. I’ll be the guy telling them to shut up and hoping you reward my efforts with a kiss on the cheek and maybe a back massage if you’re not doing anything special tonight. Enjoy.