Finally, We Might All Get A Jet Pack

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To Infinity and Beyond!

Why does the present suck so much? The answer: no jet packs. We were promised a lot of things by the futurists of the past and the Jetsons. Flying cars, robot slaves, colonies on the moon, etc. were going to be a part of daily life. But the thing I’m most pissed off about is that there is no good working jet pack. There is some BS one that shoots that launches you in the air if connected to a constant source of liquid. What the hell good is that going to do me? I live in New York City. If I used the water in the East River to propel me to Manhattan, I’m pretty sure it would melt the tubes. Luckily, it looks like we are moving in the right direction with this jet pack demonstration at the “Future is Here” exhibition held by Smithsonian Magazine. The guy flies around the Ronald Reagan Building and International Trade Center for a full 26 seconds. That’s as long as the jet pack can go before it runs out of juice. Now, that’s not enough time to get me to Manhattan, but it’s close.

If I never have to take the effing subway again I’ll be absolutely ecstatic. Of course, if I’m using a jet pack that means that millions of other a-holes will also bee filling the skies. Ugh, you just can’t win.

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