My poor, Selena Gomez. I did try to warn her to stay away from The Devil’s Midget. Now she has to see him being arrested with his skeezy new girlfriend and fleeing to Panama and all the other stuff that has left her the subject of so many tabloid questions back at home. I wish I could hug her and tell her everything is going to be alright. I wish we could have that hug with the lights dimmed and both of us nekkid as well. You know, for maximum comforting potential.
Selena fought through the tough times as any young woman would. By slapping on a pair of super tight pants and heading to the 7-Eleven. I can relate to that, except for the tight pants part. I once found myself at a 7-Eleven at 3am in my pajamas after a girl I cared a lot about but couldn’t seem to remember her birthday broke up with me. It’s just where you go when the heart is troubled. Liquor and frozen burritos, it’s a one-stop feel good shop. Though not as good as seeing Selena in tight pants makes me feel. Enjoy.