Gaming’s Whacked Out Week: The Massive Mammary Mystery is Solved (VIDEO)

Mammary Mystery Solved Header
Um... what was the question again? We drifted for a moment.

Some of us fondly remember the topless Lara Croft image that never was. This ’90s legend inspired a generation of oglers-to-be, with its promise of a piss-poor, grainy glimpse at an imaginary set of chesticles. Cut us some slack though, at the time it was the closest we had ever got to a pair.

Since that landmark moment, boobs have been inextricably linked to video games. This is mostly due to the notorious likes of Dead or Alive (see also: Senran Kagura), which are still trying to convince us that tiny undercrackers and huge pendulous melons are the only way forward for lady fighters. But who’s to blame for this turn of events? The players? The leer-happy developers?

Well, yes. And yes. But also, we discovered this week, the boardroom bigwigs of the world. Kotaku bring us the above animation from Nate Ziller, simply titled ‘Because, Boobs,’ a charmingly piss-takey account of the decisions that go into such character designs. It’s funny because it’s true, as Grandma used to say.

In particular, check out that billboard. We’re pretty damn sure we pass that exact one on our daily commute.