Let's first note this. Reality television is a horrible blight upon the intelligence and decency of our nation and world. The Real Housewives series on Bravo really belongs somewhere in the list of names of the worst of the worst for reveling in anti-social, morose, and inane behavior among adults.
Okay, now that that's said, I'd totally like to help Melissa Gorga of the Real Housewives of New Jersey in and out of a few bikinis. Mostly out of I suppose. Is it hypocritical of me to lay into reality TV then talk about my personal lust and desire for one of its denizen? No, it's not. It's called being a man, people. Enjoy.