Kimora Lee Simmons Topless on a Yacht (Damn You, Yacht People!)

 

I’ve had to face up to some harsh realities in my life. Like Hormel canned chili is not a super food. Hamsters are not impervious to being run over by fat kids on Razor Scooters. And when a girl says ‘no’, she means she wants to date my better looking roommate. But I accept and I move on. Most of the time. My inability to obtain even the most modest of yachts continues to be a reality I can’t seem to accept.  Conceivably, if I could work 43,000 hours over the next two years, I could get a downpayment on a used economy schooner. And I just know wonderful events would ensue.

Like finding Kimora Lee Simmons topless on the bow of my ship anchored off of St. Tropez. She seems quite willing to do that for the right yacht. Or yachtsman as I would be titled. Maybe Skipper McBig to my mooring buddies. But girls, lots of girls, just sunning their bare tubes, like Kimora Lee. Life would be good. I am going to make this happen, somehow. Enjoy.