Boxes, More Dragons, and Neck Stabbing: ‘Game of Thrones’ Season Finale Wrap-Up

Well, that’s it. How can you possibly top last week’s Red Wedding slaughterfest episode, ‘The Rains of Castamere’. It just couldn’t be done. What we got last night instead, was a whole lot of walking, talking, and philosophizing. Oh, and a dick in box. Literally.

This episode was pretty much all ends-consolidating: The Young Wolf is dead and the remaining Starks are pretty well scattered. Winter is still coming and it would seem that the War of the Five Kings is almost wrapped-up. What have we got to think about now?  Edmure Tully is still married to the daughter of the guy who murdered all of his friends and bannermen (those are going to be some awkward Sunday dinners); Theon Greyjoy is now a soprano; and Arya Stark is going to be so unflinchingly badass we just can’t handle it. Three dragons in flight and a whole bunch of liberated slaves? Yes, please.

What might happen next season? First off, someone needs introduce King Joffrey to Ramsay Snow, like, immediately. And two, We need the folks of Westeros to start getting amorous again, we haven’t seen any comfortable skin in like two episodes. Oh, and we’re seriously, we’re probably off sausages for a while. You understand, all those nitrates and phallic imagery and whatnot.

Now, what are we going to do until Breaking Bad starts? Go outside? Maybe.

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