February Wallet-Ravaging Incoming! Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance and Other Essential Purchases Arriving Next Month

Dead Space 3-  5 February
Dead Space 3 begins next month's wonderment, February 5.

Yes indeed. Naturellement, those that peruse the pages of Egotastic! are among the most discerning, cultured, intellectual rabble of definitely non-drunks that the universe has ever assembled. As such, you’ve surely all noticed that it’s not goddamn February yet. The caveat being that, if it were, you’d have been suddenly beset by a veritable tsunami of gaming greatness, with nary an inkling as to what to purchase first. (And nobody wants that. Remember the time you were languishing knee-deep in the ocean, and that unforeseen wave hit you right in the ballsack, in all its furious freezing force? Water, and by extension all water-based metaphors, can be humongous bitches.)

For your delectation, then, we present a timely preview of February’s impending wonderment. First, though, caveat #2: it’s rather a costly crop. Next month will see an unmissable release of great manly magnitude propelled into our delicate faces every week (if we’re counting full weeks, and refusing to be pernickety about trivial matters of semantics. Which we are, and we are). Accrue a little extra cash in any unscrupulous manner you can -perhaps rent your spare room out to your sleazy little amateur porn star neighbor, as long as he pledges to remove his array of riding crops/any errant pubes after filming- to acquire the digital triumvirate of awesome that’s coming our way soon.

Commence gallery perusal! Or something to that effect.

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