Not all three simultaneously, alas. (Although should Nintendo announce an impending 2013 Mario, in which the moustachioed maestro must shoot an odd array of bosomy farmyard animals right in the face with a rifle, you heard it here first.) What we do have is the usual cavalcade of wiener-waving whimsy that defines the odd shenanigans of the gamingverse.
In this installment, we learn the answer to that age-old query: Just what in the name of Satan’s scrotum is the correlation between a grammy-nominated video game soundtrack and gratuitous boob-ogling? Scientists were otherwise occupied growing human ears on the back of mice and/or grafting humongous whale dicks onto monkeys (while stoned), so it was incumbent upon us to find out.
Elsewhere in the gallery you’ll find, preposterously, new release Goat ‘em Up. Doctors recommend -not reputable ones, or even licensed ones in some cases, but we shan’t be pernickety- that you gorge yourself at the trough of crazy on a weekly basis, so we’d advise taking a look above.
Take a look at the horrors of Mario Warfare here.