Kristen Stewart Dons Body Baring Black in London Because That’s Where Her Muff Diving Affair Killed Her True Love

We always look beyond the obvious here at Egotastic!, mostly just because we’re too slow to pick up on the obvious often, but also because we have been gifted with superhuman powers, such as the ability to drink on the job without it affecting our speling, also the ability to read into the minds of emo thespianics like Kristen Stewart, who wore a sort of sextastic Morticia dress to the premiere of Twilight Breaking Dawn Part Way Too Many in London.

Now, not saying we don’t appreciate a dress that shows off like Kristen’s did on the red carpet, but we’re also saying that our third eye sees all, and Kristen is subtly letting her foppish boyfriend know that when she let the Snow White director dive down upon her clam, well, that entire experience is now dead to her. Book it. Enjoy.

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