Bigfoot Trashes Camper

A man in Pennsylvania claims that his Winnebago was vandalized…by bigfoot. John Reed, who mind you is a bigfoot “scholar”, says that while he and his wife were sleeping in their 1972 camper, a sasquatch casually walked by the only window in the camper. It then proceeded to pelt the busted ass camper with rocks. Now, there are several things I find weird about this story – besides the whole bigfoot not existing thing. If bigfoot exists, it is an elusive figure that hides from humans and likes to be photographed from far away with a blurry lens. It certainly wouldn’t walk by a camper window nor would it further show its presence by throwing rocks. Also, don’t they live in remote temperate forests in the Pacific Northwest? I doubt bigfoot hangs out near Philly. No, I think this John Reed guy backed into a parking pole at Walmart and decided to blame the damage on bigfoot to his insurance company. Maybe I don’t have the right plan, but I don’t think cryptozoological damage is covered.

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