Voice acting is an innocuous element in the gaming spectrum, rarely attracting the venomous bile and/or mockery that such matters as graphical finesse will. You will frequently hear complaints such as this game looks about as attractive as my bulldog’s distended scrotum! (Or something to that effect.) Conversely, less derision/handfuls of horseshit are propelled at the nut-numbingly appalling ‘acting’ within. Which is distinctly unfair, as this bunch of bastards righteously suck ass too, and they’d hate for you to forget that.
As such, today we celebrate, commiserate and raise our middle fingers at the most heinous offenders in this area. Whether Princess Peach’s falsetto repertoire of MAAAARIO entreaties make you want to punch your own ears in the face (which they do), or harrowing, farcical mistranslations into Engrish make you shed copious sad, sad tears of sadness, there’s something for everyone (to gleefully take the piss out of) in the gallery. There’s a nigh-imperceptible chasm between so appallingly bad it’s hilarious and merely so appallingly bad I could devour my own eyebrows in outrage, after all. Peruse a little from both categories of shame above.