‘Ninja Turtles’ Script Leak Confirms that It’s as Bad as Everyone Thinks–Here Are the Worst Excerpts

Michael Bay, What Were You Thinking?!

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A couple of months ago, Paramount announced that Michael Bay's Ninja Turtles reboot would be pushed back to 2014 because a lot of people had a problem with the script. A lot of true-blue TMNT fans probably breathed a sigh of relief at the news, considering that a lot of them were already up in arms over Bay's plans to give the turtles' an 'alien origin'.

And thanks to a recent leak, now we can all get a glimpse at the script that's been rumored to be a complete suckfest. It was taken offline after Paramount sent a cease-and-desist order, but we managed to get our hands on the worst of the worst, and let me just tell you--the script isn't just bad. It's laughably bad.

The Ninja Turtles as aliens? Casey Jones and April O'Neil are dating? Shredder recast as Colonel Schrader? Throw in a couple of bad jokes and references to Kermit the Frog, and basically you've got the script down pat.

TMNT co-creator Peter Laird got wind of the news and he had a few things to say about what Bay was doing to his creation.

If it is, in fact, the actual draft that was rejected and caused the production of the next TMNT movie to be pushed back to 2014 because the script was unsatisfactory, then I think all true TMNT fans should be grateful to the new “powers that be” that they did not allow this wretched thing to go any further.

It reminds me of one of the reasons I am glad to not own the property anymore… because I don’t have to tear what little hair I have left out while trying to fix junk like this.

Well said, Peter. Well said.