(Credit: All photos by Matthew Wardenaar exclusively for Egotastic!)
Forget all you've seen on the Jersey Shore with those not-even-Italian not-even-from-Jersey-girls drunk and fisticuffing on the dance floor, that's not Jersey. No, our brunette bombshells with attitude up the wazoo who truly are from Jersey, they could inspire Springsteeen to pen fourteen hundred identical songs about them and cause many a man passing his way up the Eastern Seaboard to suddenly find himself hitched to a girl in a tight top with acid-washed jeans who knows how to handle a blade, when the situation calls for it, natch.
To redeem all of Jersey Girl hotness, we called upon our good friend Diana Falzone to take some time off from her Fox News gig and her work with military.com to take a trip out to Malibu and try on some bikinis for our cameras. Sure the 'save the Jersey rep' was a lame excuse, but before Diana realized she was snookered, she was in a tiny bikini on the rocks of Malibu and we were snapping away. Such are the deceptive techniques of Egotastic!
But they are a means to an end, and in this case, the beautifully honed body of Diana Falzone and her Roman hotness like the goddess Diana before her, albeit that Diana was known as the virgin goddess, and our Diana, well, let's just say there were less eligible bachelors in the Roman Pantheon than there are in modern day Manhattan. And in that bikini, well, a man would be stupid not to at least give it a try, or a beg, or a bit of pleading, cajoling, and sobbing as necessary.
Rejoice, Italian-Americans, Jersey Girls, and the 99% of you readers out there who love hot chicks in bikinis. Rejoice, and enjoy.
(Be sure to follow Diana Falzone on Twitter and tell her what you think of her bikini pictures. You'll make her coo, I promise.)