Bigfoot Is Real And He’s A Redneck Named Randy

Bigfoot is dead…or at least someone pretending to be Bigfoot. A man with the gloriously redneck name of Randy Lee Tenley was killed by cars in Montana while dressed like Bigfoot. Why was he dressed like a Sasquatch? Because he thought it would be fun to start a good old fashioned Bigfoot hoax. Randy was wearing a military ghillie suit, which is designed to look like vegetation, when he ran out onto the freeway and was hit by oncoming traffic. While it is certainly tragic that this guy died as a result of natural selection, I can’t say as I’m surprised. That’s no way to pull of a Bigfoot hoax. Let’s examine what he did wrong.

Firstly, why did he pick a costume that looked like vegetation? Everyone knows that Bigfoot is a big fur covered ape man. Secondly, why was he loping around the freeway? I’m pretty sure if Bigfoot exists he’s going to stay as far away from the interstate as possible. If Sasquatch is a close relative of humans, he has enough brains to know that walking out in front of cars is a bad idea. Lastly, the most crucial part of doing a proper Bigfoot hoax is to provide questionable evidence. It’s not enough for people just to see it, you need to bring a buddy along to shoot some crappy video of you through heavy foliage or something. Also if he had taken a friend he would have had someone there to say, “A truck!”.

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